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[Mostly Holy]

Hello everyone. I am an amateur with no interest in publishing, but I have written poems ever since I was a little girl and have recently decided to try to work seriously on them. I am hoping to get the kind of criticism that will help me elevate my poems from "pretty but vapid" to something more powerful, I work very hard on my poems but bouncing them around inside my own skull can only get me so far.

[CRNDLSM]

How do you feel about artificial intelligence in analyzing and creating art? I'll be honest ive never quite seen critiques like yours and am suspicious, can you blame me though in today's age? I figure youre here for human input because you know ai can only do so much and it'd be kind of a waste to ask for human help and only receive artificial help. But my first suggestion would be to have a clear intention to whatever youre working on. Whether its political or vibing, have the clear intention.

[Mostly Holy]

I don't see the point of it. I used one of those tutor apps to try to get better at poetry, and it kind of helped, but not really. It just does not seem to understand anything. As a critic it has the same issue, it is fine for letting you know if your meter is off and to use as a rhyme dictionary, and ofc for researching stuff, but it is not reading the poem, and it cannot be moved by it, so its opinion on anything else is meaningless

I have not really done much critique before, Leanne's "Method, Manner, Matter" rubric has actually been somethign of a revelation. I have always struggled to express my thoughts on poems, having a framework to break them up into their parts makes it so much easier. In terms of the criticism I give, I hope it is not the kind an AI would give you. Idk much about form and rhythm and meter, which is what it is good at, but I do know if a line lands for me, and I try to give the kind of feedback I would like to get

[CRNDLSM]

I liked your villanelles in the practice area, dont stop writing

[Mostly Holy]

That is kind of you to say, and at least that makes one of us. Altho I do think my joke villanelle about how I cannot write villanelles might be the closest I have got to getting one right, whihc I guess is ironic in a disheartening sort of way : shrug :

[CRNDLSM]

Challenge to a duel 
A form off if you will
Adding to the fuel
Hoping for a spill

A form off if you will
Puzzle everyday
Hoping for a spill
To better poems that may

Puzzle everyday 
To exercise the skills
To better poems that may
Finally get yoir fill

To exercise the skills
Mastering the forms
Finally get your fill
Better becomes the norm

Mastering rhe forms
Adding to the fuel
Better becomes the norm 
I challenge to a duel

[Quixilated]

Hello and welcome to the Pigpen.

Thorough critiques are always welcome. Also, we are thrilled when new members offer many critiques rather than the bare minimum. Your many contributions are much appreciated.

Also, I thoroughly enjoyed your Siren poem. (I particularly liked the repetition of "down down/drown drown.") I have not found any of your poems to be vapid.

I hope you are enjoying your time at the pigpen and look forward to reading more of your poems. I hope the feedback in our workshops is what you are looking for.

-- Quix

[Mostly Holy]

Challenge to a duel
[...]

Ooh a pantoum, fancy! My friend writes them but I have never tried, would you say they are easier or harder than a villanelle? I could really use some kind of training wheel to get a handle on villanelles, the form is so alluring but they always mangle my ideas into nonsense.

I hope the feedback in our workshops is what you are looking for. 

Absolutely, I have already learnt a lot here just by reading commentaries on other people's poems and some of the helpful guides. I am sure I will get better eventually. I am glad you liked the Siren song, it seems my joke poems are the only ones that land. There is a lesson in there, if only I were not too proud to learn it

[CRNDLSM]

Day 1 sonnet
Day 2 rondelet
Day 3 dizain
Day 4 villanelle
Day 5 pantoum
Day 6 sestina
Day 7 limerick

We can follow the prompts in lpia or change up the forms, if youre down, starting with whatever prompt they post tonight
I have more fun with pantoums than villanelles. I had to organize the villanelle a different way for it to click

[Mostly Holy]

lpia?

[CRNDLSM]

Lets pretend its April, I think you've already posted something in one of the days

[Mostly Holy]

Oh right! A timed poem writing challenge is just about my worst nightmare, I usually take days or weeks before I am ready to show anyone something, 24 hours is barely even a first draft! Still, I will give it a go and try my hand at a sonnet :: thumbsup ::

[CRNDLSM]

Awesome looks like the first prompts a sonnet about a guilty pleasure, im excited for this duel, cheers!

[Mostly Holy]

:: sweating ::

[Quixilated]

 it seems my joke poems are the only ones that land. There is a lesson in there, if only I were not too proud to learn it

If art is like baking, then "play" is like vanilla. A little bit can elevate the recipe to something divine, (but too much is worse than none). 

Also, having fun while writing is like smiling when you talk on the phone. The audience can always tell, and usually the effect is positive.





(IMHO at least)

[CRNDLSM]

quote="Mostly Holy"]
Aaaah I messed it up! I do not think my volta lands, and I somehow managed to format it completely wrong, in three quatrains instead of two sextets! Ugh. 3/10 for effort, maybe? I am busy today so I may not have time to fix it, so here it is I guess
[/quote]
[/quote]

It looks like the 'sex'tets implied though 6/10 its a great shot in under 24 hours, 6 more days to duke it out with me though, then we can go back and edit, next prompt is a rondelet! Im having fun thank you for participating

[Mostly Holy]

Rondelets look pretty intimidating, I guess it depends what the topic is but there is not much room to cram a whole poem into five lines and a refrain

[CRNDLSM]

LPIA you can post as much or little as you want, on topic or not, our challenge was just for one rondelet, which you did pretty great. I feel like with rondelets the more the merrier, its already songsongy so just keep singing

[Mostly Holy]

>Topic : Write a poem inspired by an unusual milestone.

Okay, now I just have to find out what a "dizain" is!

[CRNDLSM]

https://www.pigpenpoetry.com/thread-9395.html

For a dizain, I called the duel so I cant be the ref but im terrible at meter so my dizain is kinda a failure, I like shooting guns but im not marksman