Call from the night

[oceanwanderer20]

Call from the Night
The darkness beckons
silently in the silky night air.
Enveloping her body in a cloak,
hugging her as an old friend.
He whispers words into her ear:
escape, bliss, wonder.
And she thinks about going with him.

She wonders what it would feel like
to see the shadows trace
the veins on her arms.
To feel frigid adrenaline
pump through her blood:
Dark, cold, comforting.
And she thinks about going with him.

He tells her of his years;
How he hides in the night.
And she thinks it seems nice
To be submerged in the calm.
Loneliness chimes in:
Peace, tranquility, freedom.
And she thinks about going with him.

But dawn breaks and darkness cries.
She fears of losing her companion
But something tells her to stay.
She hears a soft murmur in her ear:
I love you.

Darkness runs away.



Thank you so much for your edits! They all really help a lot! Here is an updated poem with some changes that were recommended:

Call of the night
The darkness beckons
silently in the silky night air.
Enveloping her body in a cloak,
hugging her as an old friend.
He whispers words into her ear:
escape, bliss, wonder.
And she thinks about going with him.

She wonders what it would feel like
to see the shadows trace
the veins on her arms.
To feel frigid adrenaline
course through her blood:
Dark, cold, restless.
And she thinks about going with him.

He tells her of his years;
How he hides in the night.
And she thinks it seems serene
To be submerged in the calm.
Loneliness chimes in:
Peace, tranquility, freedom.
And she thinks about going with him.

But dawn breaks and darkness howls.
She fears losing her companion
But whispers tell her to stay.
Love whispers in her ear:
I'm here.

Darkness slips away.

[Anonymous]

Call from the Night
The darkness beckons
silently in the silky night air. Love these first two lines! Eerie and haunting mood setter!
Enveloping her body in a cloak,
hugging her as an old friend.
He whispers words into her ear: This pronoun might trip some up upon first read, but it's meaning is elucidated by the end of the poem
escape, bliss, wonder.
And she thinks about going with him.

She wonders what it would feel like
to see the shadows trace
the veins on her arms.
To feel frigid adrenaline i wouldn't associate the energy of adrenaline with the cold, that's just my opinion
pump through her blood:
Dark, cold, comforting.
And she thinks about going with him. i don't have any other complaints regarding this stanza 

He tells her of his years;
How he hides in the night.
And she thinks it seems nice
To be submerged in the calm.
Loneliness chimes in: love this descriptor
Offering peace, tranquility, freedom.
And she thinks about going with him.

But dawn breaks and darkness cries.
She fears of losing her companion
But something tells her to stay. using the word "something" instead of going in depth seems like a cop-out here. 
She hears a soft murmur in her ear:
I love you.

Darkness runs away.

I enjoyed this poem, as it is open to many interpretations; I am almost sure it is not meant to be taken literally. Some possible conclusions running through my mind include mental illness (schizophrenia), a deceased lover, or thoughts of suicide. Thanks for a fun and thought-provoking read!

P.S. Why for the first two stanzas did you use proper capitalization, and in the last two stanzas capitalize the first word in every line? 

[stevesteve]

I like this a lot, creates a great atmosphere. My only critique is nitpicky so I'll just toss those in alongside the poem.


Call from the Night
The darkness beckons
silently in the silky night air.
Enveloping her body in a cloak,
hugging her as an old friend.
He whispers words into her ear:
escape, bliss, wonder.
And she thinks about going with him. I know this line is the focal point of the poem but each time I come back to it it interrupts the flow. Maybe it's because it's a little wordy. I could see you potentially getting rid of "with him" but I know that doesn't necessarily get the same point across.

She wonders what it would feel like
to see the shadows trace
the veins on her arms.
To feel frigid adrenaline
pump through her blood:
Dark, cold, comforting.
And she thinks about going with him.

He tells her of his years;
How he hides in the night.
And she thinks it seems nice I think you could find a better word than nice here.
To be submerged in the calm.
Loneliness chimes in:
Peace, tranquility, freedom.
And she thinks about going with him.

But dawn breaks and darkness cries.
She fears of losing her companion
But something tells her to stay. I agree with the previous comment about the word something being in the place of something potentially more creative.
She hears a soft murmur in her ear:
I love you.

Darkness runs away.


Overall I think this is really solid, everything I didn't comment on is great.

[Owl]

A nice read, I liked the relaxed tone and curious element of love. I'd say one of the biggest things that I believe you should work on is making sure every line is of great value to your poem, otherwise its presence isn't really needed.

Call from the Night
The darkness beckons
silently in the silky night air.
Enveloping her body in a cloak,
hugging her as an old friend.
He whispers words into her ear:
escape, bliss, wonder.
And she thinks about going with him.

She wonders what it would feel like
to see the shadows trace
the veins on her arms. Something about the reference to veins always intrigues me-- I like the idea of shadows tracing them.
To feel frigid adrenaline So the idea of shadows on her arm causes her to feel a "frigid adrenaline"? I feel a disconnect here... it's hard to believe that anything "dark, cold, or comforting" would cause a frigid adrenaline rush. Do you think you could possibly help the reader better understand why she's feeling this way by such a seemingly tame event?
pump through her blood:
Dark, cold, comforting.
And she thinks about going with him.

He tells her of his years;
How he hides in the night. I feel this may confuse the reader, because you titled this "Call from the Night". Can "night" hide in the "night"? Even if it was referring to the "darkness" that you referred to within the first line of the first stanza, how could darkness "hide" in the night? The night is largely darkness, and usually does not need to be found. Does this girl live in a place that is usually not dark? An extremely lit city? I believe this may need some revision.
And she thinks it seems nice Every line should hold value to your poem, otherwise it doesn't need to be present. How does "And she thinks it seems nice", really add this poem's atmosphere? How does this line impact the reader? I don't believe it does either. Revision may be needed here.
To be submerged in the calm.
Loneliness chimes in:
Peace, tranquility, freedom.
And she thinks about going with him.

But dawn breaks and darkness cries.
She fears of losing her companion
But something tells her to stay. Something? What was that something? If this "something" is an important element of the story, then tell the reader what it is! If not, then you'd be better off simply saying that she wants to somehow "stay" with the darkness, even if it is just subconscious. Let this line be effective to the story, otherwise omit it.
She hears a soft murmur in her ear:
I love you. Interesting how the darkness loves her, but still runs away. She can never really "go" with him even then, can she? Interesting concept, I can see how that could parallel a certain type of "forbidden love".

Darkness runs away.

[coolfunboy]

The mood and atmosphere of this poem sort of remind me of the graveyard poets (Thomas Gray, Edward Young)-- very sedate, dark, and brooding.
I also really like your use of repetition.

Call from the Night
The darkness beckons
silently in the silky night air.
Enveloping her body in a cloak,
hugging her as an old friend. [From the start, I feel immersed. These first few lines are very effective.]
He whispers words into her ear:
escape, bliss, wonder.
And she thinks about going with him.

She wonders what it would feel like
to see the shadows trace
the veins on her arms.
To feel frigid adrenaline [I agree with some of the other posters about this line-- although it sounds pretty, it doesn't make a lot of sense to me, nor does it fit with the mood I think you've established.]
pump through her blood:
Dark, cold, comforting.
And she thinks about going with him.

He tells her of his years;
How he hides in the night.
And she thinks it seems nice
To be submerged in the calm.
Loneliness chimes in:
Peace, tranquility, freedom.
And she thinks about going with him.

But dawn breaks and darkness cries.
She fears of losing her companion
But something tells her to stay.
She hears a soft murmur in her ear:
I love you. I have trouble with this line. I feel like you shouldn't conclude such a strong poem with such a weak line.

Darkness runs away.

[SimikPK]

Call from the Night
The darkness beckons
silently in the silky night air. As I read the rest of the poem, is the silky air necessary? And we know it is night, since it is about darkness.
Enveloping her body in a cloak,
hugging her as an old friend Normally I would be against these quite overused images, but... in such combination it works somehow. I get the image of a man wrapping a cloak about a child, and than talking to her - which also my suggest abuse, and this poem gives me the sense that the darkness does not really love her - good. But I still would be happier with some more original images. Up to you. 
He whispers words into her ear:
escape, bliss, wonder. These are too abstract. Escape from where, bliss and wonder - why?
And she thinks about going with him. It would be stronger without this "and"

She wonders what it would feel like the idea behind the line - her wondering, but it sounds too wordy to me, the "like" at the end of the line is not strong enoug.
to see the shadows trace good line, good "trace" at the end of it.
the veins on her arms. again, good line.
To feel frigid adrenaline this is interesting. adrenaline usually suggests temper(ature), hotness, but It kinda works here, it being associated with the desire, temptation AND the night.
pump through her blood: Useless line. we know that adrenaline goes to blood, no need to tell us that sky is blue and sun yellow
Dark, cold, comforting. you already said it is frigid, no need to say it is cold. And you said it is shadows, no need to say it is dark. You say she wonders, so how doesshe know its comforting and all that?
And she thinks about going with him.

He tells her of his years; good line, suggest that the telling is a narrative, and stories do have the power to lure people. 
How he hides in the night. That is the best he can tell her? What is that lures her? Maybe be more specific, or make the darkness more appealing.
And she thinks it seems nice it is too much like that refrain line, it disturbs the structure. "Nice" is rather weak, especially among such strong appeals described here. 
To be submerged in the calm. aaaabstract
Loneliness chimes in:
Peace, tranquility, freedom. This poem is way too abstract in all those abstract words. and this line kind of contradicts the line above. This line sounds positive, while loneliness negative. the colon suggest that this line explains the previous one, so thats why I am confused. 
And she thinks about going with him. The repetition works quite well, to me it suggest the persistent sense of temptation


Logically, stanzas 2 and 3 seem inverted to me. He tells her and that is which makes her think and wonder, huh?

But dawn breaks and darkness cries. because of the darkness crying I can tolearte the breaking of the dawn.
She fears of losing her companion companion? is he only that? nothing more? 
But something tells her to stay. what is this something? I want to know, or feel, or see, or hear.... No need for the "but"s 
She hears a soft murmur in her ear: aha - why say it is something when just after that say it is a murmur. Anyway, you have a very similar line in the first stanza. Maybe change one of them. 
I love you. NO. please. chliché. 

Darkness runs away. Darkness - companion - darkness. What is he then? Hasn´t her view of him changed? Is he not more than darkness at this point? Nice idea that it is he who runs away, not her.

The idea of being tempted by darkness is nothing new, but I like the attempt at describing the darkness, maybe ambivalence between it and the positive - the frigid adrenaline, the telling of the years... The weakest point is its over-vagueness and abstractness.

[pickles]

I like it and the imagery that you use is very spot on. "silky night air" really begins this poem well.
I would like to comment further but felt overwhelmed by the large amount of gender assignments. She, her, him, hers, etc... This really killed trying to take in the rest. I saw nice words and imagery amid the 'she's' but hated to even delve in until you have removed them.

The last line of the first three stanzas is fine. There are 15 more,(if my count was right), she, his, hers, him, etc...that I really think quite a few of them can be removed. Perhaps let context, or obvious relevance replace them. Perhaps personalize one of the sexes so we can have a 'me, I, or my'. Plus there are many descriptive words that imply what sex is being referred too, such as mentions of hips and/or thighs we would usually associate with a female. Strong arms or strong jaw may make the reader realize which of the two sexes is being spoken of.

Example:
As I pulled that thin waist closer to my body feeling the resistance wane, I was greeted with the whisper of "don't stop". Laughing inside as those tiptoes struggled to reach my ear.

There is no gender even telling who "I" was, but I believe that we can feel comfortable as to 'which sex is which?'. Notice that even at the end 'I was greeted with the whisper', it still does not clarify my sex or say that "she greeted me with a whisper of 'don't stop'. I used 'I was greeted', in place of 'she greeted me'. Then the mention of the tiptoes needed for the whisper to reach my ear further implies that it is a female that has the thin waist, and tiptoes needed to whisper into her lovers ear.

I am just an amateur so there may be a much more technical way of learning how to be ambiguous while still being plain.
Hope that helps.

[SimikPK]

But dawn breaks and darkness howls.
She fears losing her companion
But whispers tell her to stay. Better than the original, but... how can darkness howl and whisper at the same time?
Love whispers in her ear
I'm here. You are attempting a good solution here, the ryme doesn't even feel forced, but two "whispers" in two subsequent lines sound very disturbing

Darkness slips away.

[billy]

one liner removed, we expect more than platitudes/mod

[AronVanSciver]

I enjoyed the mystery and seductive nature of the poem.

Call from the Night

The darkness beckons
silently in the silky night air. <---Silky night air is gorgeous, especially followed by the statement that it's a cloak surrounding her.
Enveloping her body in a cloak,
hugging her as an old friend.
He whispers words into her ear:
escape, bliss, wonder.
And she thinks about going with him. <---And why wouldn't she? He's exciting and friendly, maybe even mischievous?

She wonders what it would feel like
to see the shadows trace
the veins on her arms.
To feel frigid adrenaline
pump through her blood:
Dark, cold, comforting. <---These lines make the hair on my arm stand on end.
And she thinks about going with him.

He tells her of his years;
How he hides in the night.
And she thinks it seems nice
To be submerged in the calm.
Loneliness chimes in: <---Lonely chimes of freedom...
Peace, tranquility, freedom.
And she thinks about going with him.

But dawn breaks and darkness cries.
She fears of losing her companion
But something tells her to stay.
She hears a soft murmur in her ear:
I love you.

Darkness runs away. <---Am I right to assume she's left alone? Will "I love you" be his last words to her?

[noname]

I really enjoyed this poem.

I'm wondering if there's a way to incoporate the recurring line (and she thinks about going with him) into the last stanza (eg. darkness runs away/she thought about going with him)
I agree with the other comments about "frigid adrenaline", it sounds really cool but I don't think it makes much sense and not in this poem (maybe save it for another idea because it does have a great sound to it).
I really love the structure of the stanzas and I found the poem very intruiging.