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![[Image: barbados.jpg]](http://wordbiscuit.com/im5/barbados.jpg)
< the broken vase (in retrospect) was breakable >
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
Our secret Margaritaville
Our thin excuse for felony
(Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Did I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
- - -
all this useless beauty... but what the hell, why not?
Posts: 5,057
Threads: 1,075
Joined: Dec 2009
a broken vase by any other name.
Posts: 55
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Joined: Aug 2014
(09-26-2014, 05:28 PM)rayheinrich Wrote:
< the broken vase (in retrospect) was breakable >
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
Our secret Margaritaville.
Our thin excuse for felony
(Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Do I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
- - -
It's beautiful. I don't know if I am right but I think it speaks of a clandestine relationship. It's subtle yet effective. I liked your word choices and the first two opening lines and the last two lines add to the scenic feel. The parenthesis works well.
Posts: 445
Threads: 286
Joined: Nov 2011
(09-27-2014, 12:51 PM)Tamara Wrote: (09-26-2014, 05:28 PM)rayheinrich Wrote:
< the broken vase (in retrospect) was breakable >
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
Our secret Margaritaville.
Our thin excuse for felony
(Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Did I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
- - -
It's beautiful. I don't if I am right but I think it speaks of a clandestine relationship. It's subtle yet effective. I liked your word choices and the first two opening lines and the last two lines add to the scenic feel. The parenthesis works well.
Thank you four times.
all this useless beauty... but what the hell, why not?
Posts: 1,325
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Joined: Sep 2013
(09-26-2014, 05:28 PM)rayheinrich Wrote:
< the broken vase (in retrospect) was breakable >
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
Our secret Margaritaville
Our thin excuse for felony
(Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Did I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
Its pastels reaching sea to sky
- - -
I continue to enjoy this, especially
Quote: (Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Did I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
and the title. The softness of the B sounds work so well to express vulnerability and melancholy, a sense of fondness for a regrettable event. The distance yet unshakable closeness comes through. Thanks for posting it.
billy wrote:welcome to the site. make it your own, wear it like a well loved slipper and wear it out. ella pleads:please click forum titles for posting guidelines, important threads. New poet? Try Poetic DevicesandWard's Tips
Posts: 445
Threads: 286
Joined: Nov 2011
(11-02-2014, 10:10 PM)ellajam Wrote: I continue to enjoy this, especially
Quote: (Our badlands come in turquoise hues)
Did I fuck you or you fuck me?
(The bruise will come eventually)
Barbados south of Belleplaine
and the title. The softness of the B sounds work so well to express vulnerability and melancholy, a sense of fondness for a regrettable event. The distance yet unshakable closeness comes through. Thanks for posting it.
You made my non-turquoise (but still beautiful) day.
The immoral of this poem is: "Don't take your fickle husband to symposia in Barbados."
all this useless beauty... but what the hell, why not?
