12-24-2013, 02:59 AM
I wondered if anyone would like to put forward some suggestions for the worst poet ever. (No cheating published poets please)
This is my offering.
William Topaz Mcgonagall
Although he does't attract the same fawning attention as Scotland's other poet 'Rabby' Burns. However in output terms alone, he has some claim to be Scotland's National Poet. Like Irn Bru compared to Malt Whisky as her national drink, which is which I leave you to decide, although he has been described perhaps fairly elsewhere.
"Mcgonagall has been acclaimed as the worst poet in British history. (according to the ever reliable wikipedia). The chief criticisms are that he is deaf to poetic metaphor and unable to scan correctly....With ..inappropriate rhythms, weak vocabulary, and ill-advised imagery"
He remains a firm favourite with much of his work still in publication. I enclose herewith, in appropriately festive spirit, his Christmas Carol
WELCOME, sweet Christmas, blest be the morn
That Christ our Saviour was born!
Earth’s Redeemer, to save us from all danger,
And, as the Holy Record tells, born in a manger.
Chorus –
Then ring, ring, Christmas bells,
Till your sweet music o’er the kingdom swells,
To warn the people to respect the morn
That Christ their Saviour was born.
The snow was on the ground when Christ was born,
And the Virgin Mary His mother felt very forlorn
As she lay in a horse’s stall at a roadside inn,
Till Christ our Saviour was born to free us from sin.
Oh! think of the Virgin Mary as she lay
In a lowly stable on a bed of hay,
And angels watching O’er her till Christ was born,
Therefore all the people should respect Christmas morn.
The way to respect Christmas time
Is not by drinking whisky or wine,
But to sing praises to God on Christmas morn,
The time that Jesus Christ His Son was born;
Whom He sent into the world to save sinners from hell
And by believing in Him in heaven we’ll dwell;
Then blest be the morn that Christ was born,
Who can save us from hell, death, and scorn.
Then he warned, and respect the Saviour dear,
And treat with less respect the New Year,
And respect always the blessed morn
That Christ our Saviour was born.
For each new morn to the Christian is dear,
As well as the morn of the New Year,
And he thanks God for the light of each new morn.
Especially the morn that Christ was born.
Therefore, good people, be warned in time,
And on Christmas morn don’t get drunk with wine
But praise God above on Christmas morn,
Who sent His Son to save us from hell and scorn.
There the heavenly babe He lay
In a stall among a lot of hay,
While the Angel Host by Bethlehem
Sang a beautiful and heavenly anthem.
Christmas time ought to be held most dear,
Much more so than the New Year,
Because that’s the time that Christ was born,
Therefore respect Christmas morn.
And let the rich be kind to the poor,
And think of the hardships they do endure,
Who are neither clothed nor fed,
And Many without a blanket to their bed.
My favorite lines
The snow was on the ground when Christ was born,
And the Virgin Mary His mother felt very forlorn
Surely this is a classic gem that cannot be beaten.
Now can anyone offer any better than this I wonder?
This is my offering.
William Topaz Mcgonagall
Although he does't attract the same fawning attention as Scotland's other poet 'Rabby' Burns. However in output terms alone, he has some claim to be Scotland's National Poet. Like Irn Bru compared to Malt Whisky as her national drink, which is which I leave you to decide, although he has been described perhaps fairly elsewhere.
"Mcgonagall has been acclaimed as the worst poet in British history. (according to the ever reliable wikipedia). The chief criticisms are that he is deaf to poetic metaphor and unable to scan correctly....With ..inappropriate rhythms, weak vocabulary, and ill-advised imagery"
He remains a firm favourite with much of his work still in publication. I enclose herewith, in appropriately festive spirit, his Christmas Carol
WELCOME, sweet Christmas, blest be the morn
That Christ our Saviour was born!
Earth’s Redeemer, to save us from all danger,
And, as the Holy Record tells, born in a manger.
Chorus –
Then ring, ring, Christmas bells,
Till your sweet music o’er the kingdom swells,
To warn the people to respect the morn
That Christ their Saviour was born.
The snow was on the ground when Christ was born,
And the Virgin Mary His mother felt very forlorn
As she lay in a horse’s stall at a roadside inn,
Till Christ our Saviour was born to free us from sin.
Oh! think of the Virgin Mary as she lay
In a lowly stable on a bed of hay,
And angels watching O’er her till Christ was born,
Therefore all the people should respect Christmas morn.
The way to respect Christmas time
Is not by drinking whisky or wine,
But to sing praises to God on Christmas morn,
The time that Jesus Christ His Son was born;
Whom He sent into the world to save sinners from hell
And by believing in Him in heaven we’ll dwell;
Then blest be the morn that Christ was born,
Who can save us from hell, death, and scorn.
Then he warned, and respect the Saviour dear,
And treat with less respect the New Year,
And respect always the blessed morn
That Christ our Saviour was born.
For each new morn to the Christian is dear,
As well as the morn of the New Year,
And he thanks God for the light of each new morn.
Especially the morn that Christ was born.
Therefore, good people, be warned in time,
And on Christmas morn don’t get drunk with wine
But praise God above on Christmas morn,
Who sent His Son to save us from hell and scorn.
There the heavenly babe He lay
In a stall among a lot of hay,
While the Angel Host by Bethlehem
Sang a beautiful and heavenly anthem.
Christmas time ought to be held most dear,
Much more so than the New Year,
Because that’s the time that Christ was born,
Therefore respect Christmas morn.
And let the rich be kind to the poor,
And think of the hardships they do endure,
Who are neither clothed nor fed,
And Many without a blanket to their bed.
My favorite lines
The snow was on the ground when Christ was born,
And the Virgin Mary His mother felt very forlorn
Surely this is a classic gem that cannot be beaten.
Now can anyone offer any better than this I wonder?
