Chesapeake Bay

[wasellajam]

Hi, John, Nice work on this, my only real issue is in S1, a few notes:

I step on deck to watch the dawn,
all’s quiet on the bay,
and when the mist has burnt away
we’ll have a fine new day.
This stanza still reads off. The rest of the poem has a rhyme scheme xaxa, xbxb, etc. this one has xaaa. For me that weakens the poem and L4 has no life in it.

The forest wears its mantel now
of brown and gold and red,
for burning summer days have passed,
and fall is here instead.

Long delta-flights of honking geese
come back to winter homes,
and cooler winds blow on the bay,
it's time for me to roam
Big improvement in L4.

I'll head south to the islands now,
warm seas and sandy cays
but next year I’ll be here again,
amongst these golden trees.
I'm missing the anchor that gave me traveling by boat, I enjoyed that.