Yesterday, 04:55 AM
Rorschach
I rip the stems of roses,
raptured from all that is bleak.
I, too, crumble like stone into soil,
organic, unlike the silver boxes.
There, I discover desolation,
my belly, full of earth.
Roots lap up my blood
like thirsty stallions
fighting for radiance
among the wild wheat.
And I ask the masses,
what does it mean—
the linguistic garden in which I lay?
This beauty, vivid in its chaos,
chaotic in its beauty.
Each phrase a trophy
for those clever enough to nod.
You know, don’t you?
Tell me you see the depth,
show me the richness of your pretense.
Hey everyone... I have been a bit MIA here.... But i do linger every so often to read your poetry. I wrote this one recently, and would like to work on it a bit. If you have any critiques or suggestions let me know. This is sort of two poems in one... and I'm not sure if it is coming across correctly. In the third stanza I was debating on changing "what does it mean" to "what does that mean" to point to the above two stanzas. Or maybe even add a ~ after stanza two.... or if I should keep it as is.
I rip the stems of roses,
raptured from all that is bleak.
I, too, crumble like stone into soil,
organic, unlike the silver boxes.
There, I discover desolation,
my belly, full of earth.
Roots lap up my blood
like thirsty stallions
fighting for radiance
among the wild wheat.
And I ask the masses,
what does it mean—
the linguistic garden in which I lay?
This beauty, vivid in its chaos,
chaotic in its beauty.
Each phrase a trophy
for those clever enough to nod.
You know, don’t you?
Tell me you see the depth,
show me the richness of your pretense.
Hey everyone... I have been a bit MIA here.... But i do linger every so often to read your poetry. I wrote this one recently, and would like to work on it a bit. If you have any critiques or suggestions let me know. This is sort of two poems in one... and I'm not sure if it is coming across correctly. In the third stanza I was debating on changing "what does it mean" to "what does that mean" to point to the above two stanzas. Or maybe even add a ~ after stanza two.... or if I should keep it as is.