Poem about hurting someone you love

[guitargirl37]

loneliness claws at my heart
but mistakes
scare it away
regrets swarm around my mind
but reality
won't let them stay

i put on a mask
to cover my hurt
i show the world happiness
with a pitiful smirk

i did this to myself
yet i still wonder
why
why can't it be normal again
it seems impossible to obtain
no matter how hard
i try

i wish there were words
to help me explain
what i am experiencing
through all this pain

as time marches by
i try to take it back
grab it
the clock
rewind
undo
fix all the problems
that i handed to you

sorrow questions my integrity
but my actions
laugh it off
love tries to recapture you
but your heart
has had enough

[alannaeileen]

I enjoyed how this succinctly details the emotions being experienced, distilling something as obscure and encompassing as sorrow into an easily relatable format that feels almost austere in its lovely simplicity. I think everyone will be able to sympathise with the feelings described. My favourite part is the final stanza, particularly the last three lines, because I think they are a beautifully written summation of the whole poem and thus a very fitting end... 'love tries to recapture you' particularly got me. I really like this work.

[2onthemap]

I enjoyed reading it. However I'm a bit confused about the line "but mistakes scare it away". is "it" referring to loneliness ...that claws at your heart?
The rest of if is good, especially the last phrase.

[billy]

hi guitargirl

as it stands, the poem is cliche heavy, it reads like many other poems of this genre. it needs to be more original in the telling, some images would be a good route to go. show us what you feel with an image. at present everything is being told in flat voice. make it a little ambiguous.

thanks for the read.

loneliness claws at my heart
but mistakes
scare it away
regrets swarm around my mind
but reality
won't let them stay

i put on a mask
to cover my hurt
i show the world happiness
with a pitiful smirk this is pretty much an extended cliche

i did this to myself
yet i still wonder
why
why can't it be normal again
it seems impossible to obtain
no matter how hard
i try this stanza tells us too little

i wish there were words
to help me explain
what i am experiencing
through all this pain

as time marches by
i try to take it back
grab it
the clock
rewind
undo
fix all the problems
that i handed to you

sorrow questions my integrity
but my actions
laugh it off
love tries to recapture you
but your heart
has had enough

[Searchin4happyness]

I like it. I'm feeling that way lately myself.

[Kayleeann]

For the title, you could have named it something less revealing and less telling us what the poem is about. I enjoyed reading this and often feel the same way.