Arizona Tallboys
#1
Arizona Tallboys

On Tuesdays, school dusted us
off into the neighborhood one hour early.
You and I clung together. The liquor store sign
on the corner sang "come in" in neon light,
so we each scooped out a single from our first
wallets for a can from the fridge.

We plucked the tabs with our finger fat
and popped the thing open with a chhht,
reminiscent of the big bang.
It tasted how smoking felt.
We sat on the concrete steps,
impervious to gumstains
or overdue library books.

We kicked our feet and sipped.

Then one of us would get a text from their ride
or have to warm up for band practice
and we would rip the tabs off and drop them
through the canholes. And we'd rehoist
our backpacks and say goodbye,
maybe dap each other up if we couldn't find
better words.

And as we walked our separate ways,
I'd hear the tab clinking in your aluminum vessel
with every step.
The slow, entropic heat death of the universe.
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#2
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(12-10-2025, 03:57 PM)Johicopter Wrote:  Arizona Tallboys

On Tuesdays, school dusted us
off into the neighborhood one hour early.
You and I clung together. The liquor store sign
on the corner sang "come in" in neon light,
so we each scooped out a single from our first
wallets for a can from the fridge….. I love the little detail of “first wallets” 

We plucked the tabs with our finger fat …. Love this one 
and popped the thing open with a chhht,
reminiscent of the Big Bang …. Unexpected, but good 
It tasted how smoking felt. … a line I don’t particularly care for. Reaching.
We sat on the concrete steps,
impervious to gumstains
or overdue library books. … doesn’t quite go with the rest. A sudden turn away from the tangible..and why library books? A distraction 

We kicked our feet and sipped.

Then one of us would get a text from their ride
or have to warm up for band practice
and we would rip the tabs off and drop them … love the detail again 
through the canholes. And we'd rehoist
our backpacks and say goodbye, … and again 
maybe dap each other up if we couldn't find
better words.

And as we walked our separate ways,
I'd hear the tab clinking in your aluminum vessel … brilliant 
with every step.
The slow, entropic heat death of the universe. … the end of all good things. Mirrors the Big Bang earlier. Excellent 

This is a marvellous poem. A few minor niggles, but otherwise I wouldn’t change a thing
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