LPiA-23 Nov. 28
#1
Let's Pretend it's April - Nov. 28
Rules: Write a poem for LPiA on the topic or form described. Each poem should appear as a New Reply to this thread. The goal is to, at the end of the month, have written 30 poems for the month of November. (or one, or six, or fifteen) Prompts may be revisited at any time. All members are welcome.

Topic : Write a poem inspired by a poison or venom.
Form : Any
Line requirements: 8 or more

Feel free to reply with comments or kudos as you wish. 

Questions?
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#2
Colloquy with My Kidneys

My body brews its own poison,
courtesy of my kidneys,
those favorite bits of Jack the Ripper
and Leopold Bloom,
just to give the names of two respectable admirers.

My kidneys, just as I’d forgotten their existence,
come to call.  I offer them water and placation.
They are inside me where I can’t see them, 
even behind my back.  My lungs I can image,
even my heart and liver, but my kidneys
two surprising jellyfish 
from out of my evolutionary past.

My blood is unclean, creatinine it’s called,
I pretend I can feel it in my veins.
My kidneys seem remarkably unconcerned.

I send them home, it’s like talking to the sky.

It’s a tender betrayal.  



“I send you half the Kidne I took from one women prasarved it for you tother piece I fried and ate it was very nise I may send you the bloody knif that took it out if you only wate a whil longer.”

“Mr Leopold Bloom ate with relish the inner organs of beasts and fowls. He liked thick giblet soup, nutty gizzards, a stuffed roast heart, liverslices fried with crustcrumbs, fried hencods' roes. Most of all he liked grilled mutton kidneys which gave to his palate a fine tang of faintly scented urine.” 

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#3
Poison-Tipped Arrows

I'm not so sure
Cupid will escape
the forensics 
we have today
and I for one, hope he fries.

Half his potions 
are pure poison,

and the other half
Alchemic Hail Marys.

I trusted him once,

but for now,
the boy is cancelled.
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#4
Zeroes and Ones

The zeroes and ones
aren’t playing nice
on my machine at home,
and I’ll be damned
trying this on my phone.

It’s been fun
looking in, though.

Consider me a poisonous
snake in the grass;
in the meantime
better watch yer ass.
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#5
Final Poison


It’s said and it is true:
“The poison is the dose”
which is to say all things
are deadly at some concentration
and all things likewise harmless
at a harmless dose– and yet
there is another attribute
which makes a poison: secrecy.

Poison, as the layman understands,
is not taken willingly
except by suicides.  A poisoner
depends on fraud - a show
of harmlessness; war gas
loses effectiveness, timely perceived.
Poison, like the unseen bullet,
is a magic trick, invisible, a con
which could be evaded
were the victim made aware.

Perhaps most poisonous
and unseen thing of all,
deadly in either overdose or under-dose
and even in just measure
is time’s passage with its trick
of always seeming
about to continue
feedback award Non-practicing atheist
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#6
A Poison
 
      Here grows the cure of all, this fruit divine,
      Fair to the eye, inviting to the taste,
      Of virtue to make wise. What hinders, then,
     To reach, and feed at once both body and mind?*
 
 
—Oi, look at this, I cut myself.
 
                           My Queen, 
                my universe,
poke those holes in upside down—it works, my chemist said.
                                            
                                          And then, let’s watch Cocktail, eat boiled mussels, and fuck
             till we’re not fit for purpose—let's give movies stars!
 
 
 
 
 
Every technique alleviates any relief
from what’s already always, forever,
                                                    and eternally,
                         a brief despair.




*from Paradise Lost
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#7
(12-03-2023, 08:04 AM)Pike Wrote:  A Poison
 
      Here grows the cure of all, this fruit divine,
      Fair to the eye, inviting to the taste,
      Of virtue to make wise. What hinders, then,
     To reach, and feed at once both body and mind?*
 
 
—Oi, look at this, I cut myself.
 
                           My Queen, 
                my universe,
poke those holes in upside down—it works, my chemist said.
                                            
                                          And then, let’s watch Cocktail, eat boiled mussels, and fuck
             till we’re not fit for purpose—let's give movies stars!
 
 
 
 
 
Every technique alleviates any relief
from what’s already always, forever,
                                                    and eternally,
                         a brief despair.




*from Paradise Lost

This poem really interests me, especially for its whimsy.  Even though all the characters seem to come from a strange alternate universe, they are grounded in ours by the quote from Paradise Lost.  So the hunt begins with an "Oi!", who's the Queen & Queen of what?  Then the "chemist" (so many memorable chemists out there, how to choose?) and his odd prescription.  Then the climax, literal and figurative with the comedian Cocktail. "I'd cut "Let's give the movies stars"....it dates the poem, which is otherwise timeless.

The above is not criticism but an atempt at detailing the wonder I felt reading this.  The last bit about "Every technique..." is appropriate but heavy going". Maybe another Milton quote instead?



 
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#8
(12-03-2023, 10:39 PM)TranquillityBase Wrote:  
(12-03-2023, 08:04 AM)Pike Wrote:  A Poison
 
      Here grows the cure of all, this fruit divine,
      Fair to the eye, inviting to the taste,
      Of virtue to make wise. What hinders, then,
     To reach, and feed at once both body and mind?*
 
 
—Oi, look at this, I cut myself.
 
                           My Queen, 
                my universe,
poke those holes in upside down—it works, my chemist said.
                                            
                                          And then, let’s watch Cocktail, eat boiled mussels, and fuck
             till we’re not fit for purpose—let's give movies stars!
 
 
 
 
 
Every technique alleviates any relief
from what’s already always, forever,
                                                    and eternally,
                         a brief despair.




*from Paradise Lost

This poem really interests me, especially for its whimsy.  Even though all the characters seem to come from a strange alternate universe, they are grounded in ours by the quote from Paradise Lost.  So the hunt begins with an "Oi!", who's the Queen & Queen of what?  Then the "chemist" (so many memorable chemists out there, how to choose?) and his odd prescription.  Then the climax, literal and figurative with the comedian Cocktail. "I'd cut "Let's give the movies stars"....it dates the poem, which is otherwise timeless.

The above is not criticism but an atempt at detailing the wonder I felt reading this.  The last bit about "Every technique..." is appropriate but heavy going". Maybe another Milton quote instead?



 

Thanks. It was niggling at me that I had missed this "A poison" prompt. I couldn't connect with it. Until yesterday when I was looking at my bookshelf and saw The Poetical Works of John Milton [Everyman's Library edition—1925], and thought "the serpent, the tree, the fruit..." and that was my "in". It took me longer to decide on the quote than to write the rest of the poem. I was perilously close to just sitting there and reading the whole of Paradise Lost, again. 
I agree that the "let's give movies stars" line can be cut. It does date the poem and that hadn't occurred to me before
I also agree that the last bit "every technique..." could be cut, changed, or something else. And I actually wanted to end on a Milton quote from the Serpent. Something like: "your fear of death itself removes the fear." But, I didn't want it to be more quote than poem, as the "my Queen, my universe" is obliquely quoting the serpent when referring to Eve as "Queen of this universe". 

Anyway, thank you for reading it and taking the time to comment.  Thumbsup
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