Mary Berry
#1
Mary Berry, pulled in tight,
knees together, face alight
to the tablet in her hand. Gears
grind, commuting daily, she fears
the woman to her right
demurely dressed, may catch sight
of the word Can Upset Nursing Team.

Robin Buffchest, alpha male,
sets his points to grease the rail,
enter through the female arts
of parts, unconnected to the heart;
which pulse, quail, and never fail
to excite, when coaxed under the assail
of manicured fingers.

Mary Berry, alights the train,
collects coffee, joins the trail
of business minded folk.
Finds her chair, hangs her coat,
assigns post its to the bin. Jane
relates another tale, this time the drains
overflowed and blocked.

Numbers come, and numbers go, feet
walk miles, round, beneath the seat
shoes on, shoes off, page after page.
Daydreams snap from looks exchanged
familiar faces, backs of heads. Meet
mid morning through the glass, cheek
held up by helpful fist.

Sushi time, crisps; orange juice without the bits,
Jane's behind, a book or more, Robin's tricks
she wants to know, when uninvited down sits
Damian from claims. Buttons checked. He insists
to know, the way to go, on Donovan and Hicks
and have they heard the cooler talk, about Peter Briggs?
Six months they say.

The afternoon slips away, toilet break
telephone calls, wriggled toes, time to make
solid supper plans. Visualize what's in the fridge;
bagged salad, pork chops, half a cabbage,
celery sticks. Decisions still to make, in the wake
of the numbers on the screen. At last it's time to take
her coat and leave.

Mary Berry, rejects the call, to join them all,
in the pub for Paul's birthday. Spoiled
for choice, she window shops, as she walks,
lost in thought, to catch the train. The seat she sought
by the window is free. Tucked in small
knees together, tablet out, she allows herself to fall
once more into the little game.
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#2
(03-11-2014, 04:38 AM)jeremyyoung Wrote:  Mary Berry, pulled in tight,
knees together, face alight
to the tablet in her hand. Gears
grind, commuting daily, she fears
the woman to her right
demurely dressed, may catch sight
of the word Can Upset Nursing Team.

Robin Buffchest, alpha male,
sets his points to grease the rail,
enter through the female arts
of parts, unconnected to the heart;
which pulse, quail, and never fail
to excite, when coaxed under the assail
of manicured fingers.

Mary Berry, alights the train,
collects coffee, joins the trail
of business minded folk.
Finds her chair, hangs her coat,
assigns post its to the bin. Jane
relates another tale, this time the drains
overflowed and blocked.

Numbers come, and numbers go, feet
walk miles, round, beneath the seat
shoes on, shoes off, page after page.
Daydreams snap from looks exchanged
familiar faces, backs of heads. Meet
mid morning through the glass, cheek
held up by helpful fist.

Sushi time, crisps; orange juice without the bits,
Jane's behind, a book or more, Robin's tricks
she wants to know, when uninvited down sits
Damian from claims. Buttons checked. He insists
to know, the way to go, on Donovan and Hicks
and have they heard the cooler talk, about Peter Briggs?
Six months they say.


The afternoon slips away, toilet break
telephone calls, wriggled toes, time to make
solid supper plans. Visualize what's in the fridge;
bagged salad, pork chops, half a cabbage,
celery sticks. Decisions still to make, in the wake
of the numbers on the screen. At last it's time to take
her coat and leave.



Mary Berry, rejects the call, to join them all,
in the pub for Paul's birthday. Spoiled
for choice, she window shops, as she walks,
lost in thought, to catch the train. The seat she sought
by the window is free. Tucked in small
knees together, tablet out, she allows herself to fall
once more into the little game.
Excellent...just the perfect antidote to mundanity. Envy.
Best,
tectak
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#3
Thank you tectak... I am relieved not to be savaged by you Wink
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#4
(03-11-2014, 05:53 AM)jeremyyoung Wrote:  Thank you tectak... I am relieved not to be savaged by you Wink

Good is good...bad is bad. This is good.
Best,
tectak
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#5
I really wanted it to keep rigidly to the same rhythm as in the first line, all the way through, as in a certain type of comic ditty. A wonderful collation of sharp observation, of a particular and well-known to many, side of life in what some folk call this vale of tears.
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#6
Thank you Abu.

I tried to keep that rhythm, with the internal rhymes.
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#7
Jeremy,

To me it read read well, only in a few parts did you seem to lose the rhythm. Not major, and I don't remember what parts they were and as this is fun poetry, I'll not go looking Smile

could you explain this reference "may catch sight of the word Can Upset Nursing Team." Seem like more than one "word", or does this reference something I am unfamiliar with, as I am at a loss a to what you intend here? More curious, than a criticism.

Best,

dale
How long after picking up the brush, the first masterpiece?

The goal is not to obfuscate that which is clear, but make clear that which isn't.
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#8
Erthona

If you get your medical notes and the term Can Upset Nursing Team is used, it means the medical staff think you are a c**t.

Other phrases to look out for are TKBundy - totally knackered but not dead yet, NFN - Norfolk for Norfolk and FLK - funny looking kid.

The idea is that she is reading a smut book - female porn - about Robin Buffchest, probably entitled 'the little game' - le petit jeux - French for oral sex.

About the rhythm, it wasn't so much lost as set aside to give the poem breath. I did find it interesting when looking at it, that the first four verses where composed walking to and from the shops, whereas the last three were written when I was sitting down, and it is noticeable that the lines spread with my backside.
errr.. Normal for Norfolk methinks unless I'm FOS.
Best,
tectak
Reply
#9
I knew someone that used to DAT, dumb as a tree.
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