A Girl of Can't

[penguingina]

I can't look in the mirror
Because I hate who's looking back
I can't walk into clothing stores
Because they never have my size
I can't wear high heels
Because my feet are too wide
I can't wear makeup
Because it would be too pathetic
I can't sit in theater seats
Because my tummy is too big
I can't feel sexy
Because my breasts are too small
I can't hide behind sunglasses
Because my eyeglasses are in the way
I can't be in group photos
Because I am the least beautiful friend
I can't feel good
Because I feel so bad

[billy]

hi penguin.

one of the problems with your poem is the repetition, it becomes boring.

try and sting how the person in the poem feels without all the [i can't be's] and the [because's]

won't look in the mirror
hate who's looking back
never walk into clothing stores
they don't carry my size
no high heels
with feet this wide

once you get something less regimented you'll be able to add some other stuff and embellish what you've got

[clemonz]

it would be too pathetic

an amusing change of diction, it reinforces the sense of a complex speaker.

[nicksherman]

I agree with billy's post, in that your poem would be stronger if some of the repetitive words were edited. But, you do a good job of showing how impactful our physical appearance can be on the rest of our life, regardless of how well we're doing in other aspects.

I really like "I can't be in group photos; because I am the least beautiful friend." It goes a bit deeper by showing how relationships are being affected. Being envious of or not good enough for others.

[Zainabk]

Thanks for sharing your poem. I didn't get it completely either. It was too repetitive and not everything seemed like a valid reason for it to not work out. e.g. I can't wear makeup
Because it would be too pathetic

Good luck!