Don't Speak to Me in Tongues. by William Marsland

[billy]

I don’t want to be
(an)achronistic fossil
suspended in scholastic resin
some academia nut
rutted in the brittle-drone
syndrome of sin-tax and new facts

I don’t require a requiem
of mortarboards flung skyward
cold clichés of camaraderie
or honours bound
that drum out
masonic-like
in words that hiss but make no sound

I don’t yearn for tête-à-tête
with educational grand prix
whose coffee cups are stroked
around the crusted rim
with anecdotal tales
conversely told with vim

I want to see in blacks and whites and grey
what an edifice can say
to me in terms of lay and lie
I want to feel and hear it
fly below my head
I want to know
what’s just been
fucking said

[addy]

Don't know what else to say, you're form's pretty spot on. You can take any comments I make as minor

I don’t want to be
(an)achronistic fossil
suspended in scholastic resin
some academia nut
rutted in the brittle-drone
syndrome of sin-tax and new facts Love the groove of this stanza

I don’t require a requiem
of mortarboards flung skyward
cold clichés of camaraderie
or honours bound
that drum out
masonic-like
in words that hiss but make no sound This was the only line that escaped me. (maybe I'm just slow LOL)

I don’t yearn for tête-à-tête
with educational grand prix
whose coffee cups are stroked
around the crusted rim
with anecdotal tales
conversely told with vim This was the weakest stanza for me.. not because it's bad, far from it. Just that there wasn't anything particularly interesting about its rhythm

I want to see in blacks and whites and grey
what an edifice can say
to me in terms of lay and lie
I want to feel and hear it
fly below my head
I want to know
what’s just been
fucking said Loved these last lines

Definitely one of your best ones, for me

[Bianca Alabaster]

I think this poem is absolutely perfect! yes yes!

[digna_sofia]

OUCH. This felt like it was directed at me circa 2005 (Pretentious Lit major that I was) XD Addy's pretty much made the very minor corrections that I wanted to make. I liked it ^^;

[billy]

thanks for the feedback. (and thanks for liking it digna)

i'll take a look at your suggestions addy

as always