i think a word on it's own is seldom cliche, what makes the cliche is the context with which we use it.
howling at the moon,, or the harvest moon, or gazing at the moon are cliche.
as you say it is hard to translate from language to another, that you try is commendable. not knowing the ins and outs of your language we can only give feedback in how the work is presented.
i like how you presented this one. at first it reads a a little confusing but i think the poem is better for it, for making the reader find the thoughts behind it. my only constructive comment would be that there are too many dashes and a little to do on the enjambment on L12.
i really liked what you did in showing the town and it's absent inhabitants. alive in it's touching of houses
i enjoyed the read, thank you
howling at the moon,, or the harvest moon, or gazing at the moon are cliche.
as you say it is hard to translate from language to another, that you try is commendable. not knowing the ins and outs of your language we can only give feedback in how the work is presented.
i like how you presented this one. at first it reads a a little confusing but i think the poem is better for it, for making the reader find the thoughts behind it. my only constructive comment would be that there are too many dashes and a little to do on the enjambment on L12.
i really liked what you did in showing the town and it's absent inhabitants. alive in it's touching of houses
i enjoyed the read, thank you