non-recurring dream

[Wildcard]

Hi tectak,

I'm a novice, blah blah . . . anyway here goes:

Non-recurring dream --Is this the title or the first line? (Please let it be the title! [If this is the title, then why is it here? The title goes in the thread name {Please forgive me if this is the title . . . | and also if it isn't |}])
Last night the chain that drags to dawn was broken by her smile.
The sleep that heals was longer by the links unjoined; and while
the dead time lasted, and while the dark air swirled,
I held on to her, breathed her skin,
touched her sweetness, entered in,
and round her body curled.

Mine again, mine again, thank God she is mine again. --I'm fresh off a repetition lesson from abu nuwas so I have a little more appreciation for the song-like 'refrain' here and again later. The repetition really does capture the insanity of obsessing over that which you cannot (or should not) have.
Keep the dream, die in sleep, as long as she is mine again.

Last night the chain that holds and binds was broken by her smile.
The hours of night were endless angst, an unrelenting trial.
Loosed into the loveless void, with wretched wraith like peers, --could be the way I'm reading it, but the meter seems faulty at the start of this line.
I screamed her name, her name is life;
Then fell upon that blessed knife
called peace or death or fear.

Mine again, mine again, thank God she is mine again.
Keep the dream, die in sleep, as long as she is mine again.

Tectak
2012

Overall: I really got a good feeling from this. Which is weird because its really kind of dark, but that's just me I guess.

Thanks for sharing.

In my quote, your refrain looked like this:

 Mine again, mine again, thank God she is mine again.
Keep the dream, die in sleep, as long as she is mine again.

Since it was that way both times I'm assuming that was your intended layout. To accomplish that you would just insert the 'sp' tag into the sentence like this:

Code:

[sp] Mine again, mine again, thank God she is mine again.
Keep the dream, die  in sleep, as long as she is mine again.

Note: You must place a space or line break between the 'sp' tag and the next word.