12-19-2011, 05:05 PM
Hi, Mark - thank you for your contribution. If I am remiss and don't get to others it's because I am in the middle of flu. I'm not a doctor person...so, I've assumed it will get better eventually...but, to-day after a week of trying to cough my lungs up through my mouth (nice!) I'm finally going to see if I can get a doctor's appointment.
I remember when I got to the word 'game' it was 'contest' originally but I didn't want two syllables and also 'game' found an echoing sound with 'brain' and I was hooked.
I agree on jettisoning the final line...I often have difficulty in knowing how to end stuff!
'Rhubarb' refers to the word extras are supposed to repeat to look as if they are actually talking...but it is meaningless chatter. And Noel Coward plays were full of stiff-upper lip people never saying what they really want to say.
But, to strictly truthful this was a very spontaneous - straight from the brain to the page thing - so it doesn't deserve much attention!
looking at it now, I can see that I am mucking about (as we say here in the UK)
....my brain doesn't wave/it shakes its fist - being an example of my silliness
I remember when I got to the word 'game' it was 'contest' originally but I didn't want two syllables and also 'game' found an echoing sound with 'brain' and I was hooked.
I agree on jettisoning the final line...I often have difficulty in knowing how to end stuff!
'Rhubarb' refers to the word extras are supposed to repeat to look as if they are actually talking...but it is meaningless chatter. And Noel Coward plays were full of stiff-upper lip people never saying what they really want to say.
But, to strictly truthful this was a very spontaneous - straight from the brain to the page thing - so it doesn't deserve much attention!
looking at it now, I can see that I am mucking about (as we say here in the UK)
....my brain doesn't wave/it shakes its fist - being an example of my silliness