09-28-2011, 10:01 PM
AA,
The best Sonnets do not rely on filler-words for the sake of maintaining meter. Anyone actually crafting poems understands sonnets are not spur of the moment pieces to be cooked up like a microwaveable snack. Poets fail, at any form when all they see is rhyme and meter. Deeper analysis will prove it takes something other than perfunctory practice to create something worthwhile.
As an example, if you wanted to make something of this piece you might first go through and take out every word that adds nothing to the meaning. Extraneous words such as “the" or "an” as well as pronouns that appear redundant, such as “his” in several of your lines. That alone will completely change the scansion of your piece. Even so, after this apply Samuel Taylor Coleridge’s lesson: “Poetry: The best words in the best order;” go through and replace ineffective or weak groups of words with stronger, more effective ones that express a particular thought more clearly if not more simply.
Do these first and you will begin to understand the form is more complex than most poets imagine.
Sid
The best Sonnets do not rely on filler-words for the sake of maintaining meter. Anyone actually crafting poems understands sonnets are not spur of the moment pieces to be cooked up like a microwaveable snack. Poets fail, at any form when all they see is rhyme and meter. Deeper analysis will prove it takes something other than perfunctory practice to create something worthwhile.
As an example, if you wanted to make something of this piece you might first go through and take out every word that adds nothing to the meaning. Extraneous words such as “the" or "an” as well as pronouns that appear redundant, such as “his” in several of your lines. That alone will completely change the scansion of your piece. Even so, after this apply Samuel Taylor Coleridge’s lesson: “Poetry: The best words in the best order;” go through and replace ineffective or weak groups of words with stronger, more effective ones that express a particular thought more clearly if not more simply.
Do these first and you will begin to understand the form is more complex than most poets imagine.
Sid