The Nihilist's First Psalm

[billy]

i saw you at the church today.
you waved to me & i waved back.

you went inside to worship your God.
i went to MacDonald's to worship mine. can this be rephrased keeping the i went to macdoalds?

neon & candles compete.

for me the former always wins;
this is a world of sidewalks, bins, would 'in the' work instead of 'this is a' would an "and work better than the comma between sidewalks and bins

discarded sandwiches & death. could this move up and pair with the neon line (this is a great line)

whatever transient pleasures,
be they destructive or common, would this verse work better without this line
are worth pursuing in this life. is 'in this life' needed

don't dwell on who's behind the door. i really think this line is a strong closer. it's also my fave.

i like the comparison to the two religions. and the fact it depicts a sign of the times. i think if you can tighten it up just a little it would be publishable jmo
thanks for the read.