08-05-2011, 09:45 AM
i like the premise that death and life are games of chance, old adages but good grist for the poetry mill.
here it's mainly death that's discussed, or the surviving of it. i like the questions and the use of war and city life
to juxtapose who gets chose and when.
the last verse wasn't as fresh as the 1st 2 verse.
i think a few of the words could be removed and in doing so tighten the poem up a little.
i love the 2nd verse and what it implies, and shows.
all in all a good read, thanks.
here it's mainly death that's discussed, or the surviving of it. i like the questions and the use of war and city life
to juxtapose who gets chose and when.
the last verse wasn't as fresh as the 1st 2 verse.
i think a few of the words could be removed and in doing so tighten the poem up a little.
i love the 2nd verse and what it implies, and shows.
all in all a good read, thanks.