I think the lines that make this work for me are:
Your clock was fast, my mind was slow.
Had we reset them long ago,
(that's just clever phrasing. I think of a biological clock. I also like the idea of going out of sync with one another).
by now you might have been aware
how skilled I am at solitaire.
I might have seen the games you played
of musical-cabs and masquerade
The solitaire line is great to say how one partner is comfortable going on alone, and it's a good introduction to games. The final lines strikes me as code for deception and possible infidelity. The mights seem too weak. You would think in at least one case or maybe both they should be musts.
I thought this was a cleanly written, solid read.
Best,
Todd
Your clock was fast, my mind was slow.
Had we reset them long ago,
(that's just clever phrasing. I think of a biological clock. I also like the idea of going out of sync with one another).
by now you might have been aware
how skilled I am at solitaire.
I might have seen the games you played
of musical-cabs and masquerade
The solitaire line is great to say how one partner is comfortable going on alone, and it's a good introduction to games. The final lines strikes me as code for deception and possible infidelity. The mights seem too weak. You would think in at least one case or maybe both they should be musts.
I thought this was a cleanly written, solid read.
Best,
Todd
The secret of poetry is cruelty.--Jon Anderson