06-29-2010, 01:24 PM
Hello once again... this one I am about to share is a song created by my buddy... We have a band with 3 other people. He gave me the lyrics and i was like well there is a lot of cliche. I think i should let the experts view this one haha... and yes he's a beginner too..
could lyrics for a song be critiqued like a poem? I think it can?
Verse # 1
You blew me away when you smiled
just wish you stayed another while.
There was a traffic jam in my head
thinking of the words
I should have said.
But it matters no more,
cause your already gone.
Verse #2
I remember those special moments,
the ones we could never forget about.
I kept them so close to my heart,
that I cried, and cried, and cried.
'Till I could no more,
when i heard the news.
verse 1 and two repeats then the chorus comes along lol...
Chorus
You passed away,
your with God my dear,
I will never forget you.
You'll be in my heart,
always in my mind,
I will always and forever love you
I'll forever love you...
could lyrics for a song be critiqued like a poem? I think it can?
Verse # 1
You blew me away when you smiled
just wish you stayed another while.
There was a traffic jam in my head
thinking of the words
I should have said.
But it matters no more,
cause your already gone.
Verse #2
I remember those special moments,
the ones we could never forget about.
I kept them so close to my heart,
that I cried, and cried, and cried.
'Till I could no more,
when i heard the news.
verse 1 and two repeats then the chorus comes along lol...
Chorus
You passed away,
your with God my dear,
I will never forget you.
You'll be in my heart,
always in my mind,
I will always and forever love you
I'll forever love you...