she smiles - edit4

[milo]

she smiles
and feeling so relieved
in that warm swift moment
I must cry except
it’s gone before my tears can well

then terror strains and locks
her features back with knowing
only that she cannot understand
or put a name to anything she sees

dementia’s not damnation
for it fades
into waking unconsciousness
with its heartbreaking smile
until tension
crippled mindfulness
and fears return

not damnation
since neither deserved
nor endless

I have read through it a few times and for the life of me I cannot understand why you switch from showing the reader and letting them decide what to think about it to telling the reader what to think.  As I reader, I don't like anyone telling me what to think much less a poet.

This whole section:

"dementia’s not damnation
for it fades
into waking unconsciousness
with its heartbreaking smile
until tension
crippled mindfulness
and fears return"

pretty much ruins it for me.  The beginning was a solid start at just letting me experience it so I am perplexed at what happened here.