Silence given

[brynmawr1]

pause          a pause?   Maybe make this the title instead
  is not absence—
      it is permission.    A lot of is's in these three lines.  Thought about making this line, 'but permission'  though I like the repeat of it is in the next line.  Hmmmm....

it is
         the gate unlatched
             before the wind knows it’s welcome.   I like this line.  Reminds me of the line "like the sound of music right before the record skips"

i do not force it.
              i mirror the folds
                  in your voice,     of?
                     your hesitations,   don't like hesitations.  too much like pause but I think not effective here
                         your return.

the pause is
    an invitation
      to not decide
        what it must become.

and you—
  you get to generate   maybe just me, but I find this line confusing
        because the edge
          never stops whispering.   really like these two lines

possibility is the pause   consider 'the pause is possibility/ when held'  the long enough is implied, IMO
  held long enough
    to make a door
        out of silence.   rec cutting out.  makes line a little more unexpected and opens double meaning of literal and metaphorical texture, IMO.

Hi Screams.
Evocative piece.  I made some inline suggestions above.  I thought about suggesting cutting S3, but it does help ground the poem, which I like.  I also find the form effective in adding to the pausey feel.  I am not a fan of the title.  I would consider my suggestion above or something more tangential or even completely unrelated but evocative.  I hate titles so I have no clever suggestions.  I hope you find some of this helpful.
Thanks for the read,
Bryn