A Sworn Statement (new title: Fool's Gold)

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A Sworn Statement

Powdered pearl dusts the sky
to the west, backlit by dawn,
a hemisphere of dominance
dancing to the tune of caffeine
and consciousness before the fall
into social confusion fragments
the solitude of first awakening. …. There’s a lot going on in these lines. Can’t say I like all of it. “Powdered pearl” doesn’t do it for me. Nor “dancing to the tune of” - both are cliche / cliche bordering  

Memory arrives with its clattering 
like the wheels of  a wooden cart … would it be better to lose the “with its”?
weighed down with the revolution
of bodily functions, heart and lungs
demanding recognition and return.
Flesh and blood suck up gravity
until muscles rebel against immobility. …. Bodily functions, demanding recognition, rebel against immobility are all heavy handed 

Eyes revert to the day’s pavement,
ears to the interruptions of action.
Words flee back into the silence … retreat rather than flee back? Love the idea, though 
of thought, uncertain, self-doubting.
I rise up and the moment has vanished
into footsteps, voices, and disbelief.
This is the testimony of my loss. … a good last line 

Hi TqB - this one’s the Titus Andronicus of your oeuvre, but I’m sure you can do something with it