Draft 2: Our Silence in the World We Build

[Mark A Becker]

Hi Velasco-
Interestiing piece of work. 

Every station emits static like a gentle storm 
that would have woken and encouraged us
to stay inside—me listening to music,  the italicized phrase seems awkward to me. Take out 'would have woken' and I think it works better.
you enveloped in a book; and curled in our own blankets. why 'own'? Would you be curled in someone else's blankets?
The pulse of conversations spanning countries
has gone from what power lines remain.  'has disappeared' ?? Also, power lines don't carry communications signals- 'lines of communication' do, though, and would resonate with 'conversations'
There's always something to be said,  'There was always' ??
so when there's nothing being said, the air between us
becomes too sacred to form into words and we can hear
a blue jay calling from a dormant cable. 'a silent cable'  ??  Not a fan of 'dormant' but it's not my poem.