01-30-2023, 12:50 AM
Hi Tim-very poignant piece. A few in-line comments, below:
Catechism great title
Spring is coming,
I can feel it in the rain.
Is three years long enough
to abstract the grief
from the April of your going?
The phone call was simple,
“John is gone” said my daughter.
and my question, “Gone where?” struck part of this line, so that your answer is more immediate
was my startled response.
Even now it’s a question
no one can answer. Works very well for your specific meaning, and as a general observation that hints back to the title.
There was a time before you lived
and now a time after.
There’s nothing else to conclude
but that April is coming "April is coming, again." ???
like a man on the moon. This where a refrain might work better: "I can feel it in the rain."
Catechism great title
Spring is coming,
I can feel it in the rain.
Is three years long enough
to abstract the grief
from the April of your going?
The phone call was simple,
“John is gone” said my daughter.
and my question, “Gone where?” struck part of this line, so that your answer is more immediate
was my startled response.
Even now it’s a question
no one can answer. Works very well for your specific meaning, and as a general observation that hints back to the title.
There was a time before you lived
and now a time after.
There’s nothing else to conclude
but that April is coming "April is coming, again." ???
like a man on the moon. This where a refrain might work better: "I can feel it in the rain."