01-20-2023, 12:20 AM
I like the "vines" change.
As far as the word "chalice", if I change it to "cup", then I want to consider what "rest" can be changed to for either a rhyme or slight rhyme.
Now my problem is with the phrase "stay alive". It doesn't seem to go in the same direction the rest of the poem is going.
As far as the word "chalice", if I change it to "cup", then I want to consider what "rest" can be changed to for either a rhyme or slight rhyme.
Now my problem is with the phrase "stay alive". It doesn't seem to go in the same direction the rest of the poem is going.

