A few lines
#3
I like how the 'moons' and 'suns' is a reference to time, not alient planets.
I like the 'shine' / 'rise' part-rhyme.

I'd prefer 'vines' to 'wines', but otherwise it reads fine to me.
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Messages In This Thread
A few lines - by burrealist - 01-19-2023, 12:58 AM
RE: A few lines - by TranquillityBase - 01-19-2023, 10:20 AM
RE: A few lines - by busker - 01-19-2023, 04:25 PM
RE: A few lines - by Mark A Becker - 01-19-2023, 10:26 PM
RE: A few lines - by burrealist - 01-20-2023, 12:20 AM
RE: A few lines - by Mark A Becker - 01-20-2023, 01:43 AM



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