Go-No-Go

[TranquillityBase]

I don't know if you're going for humor but I think it is readable all the way through, you said it's not done and if the rest is like this I'm interested to see where it goes

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Crndlsm,

Thanks for reading and the detailed notes.  I really appreciate that.  Yes, black humor, maybe satire.  I've tinkered with this for years, so some of the references are obscure I expect.
TqB

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I'll restrict my comments to the length and readability. I think you've done a really good job of breaking this up into bite-sized morsels. Readers nowadays (not all) have an ever shrinking attention span. You've broken it up in a way that encourages readers to take a bite, then another and so on. So, for me it remains engaging to the end. You might want to find a way to cut the last section in two, for the sake of uniformity. An issue for me might be that longer pieces never seem to get the same kind of fine tuning that short ones do. I think the best path to workshop this would be to edit each section independently and when you're satisfied, workshop it as a whole. They're two very different things and tricky to reconcile.

Thanks Tiger,

This is the kind of guidance I was looking for.  I think workshopping the sections individually makes sense.  Or at least smaller junks.  I'm glad you found it worth reading to the end.  I've wanted to show this to someone for a long time.

TqB