07-22-2020, 12:09 AM
This needs a lot more concrete images to hold the reader.
I can look through you like glass,
Describe the person or scene and maybe have some distorted element as reflection.
Or spend all my time
Imagining pictures in all of your smudges.
Instead of talking about a picture, show the reader a picture.
But in the end
I'm always more mesmerized by the scenery
And know there are windows and building out there
Describe your window and building. Is it brick? Are the windows old or new?
Much more beautiful than you.
Are (her) windows old or new? Is (her) building brick?
I'm no good with anything fragile;
Maybe you drop something fragile, literally?
It's bound to break beneath my feet.
Let your word choice as you build imagery invoke most of the conceptual meaning.
Use imagery with a topical meaning to build a inner conceptual meaning.
I can look through you like glass,
Describe the person or scene and maybe have some distorted element as reflection.
Or spend all my time
Imagining pictures in all of your smudges.
Instead of talking about a picture, show the reader a picture.
But in the end
I'm always more mesmerized by the scenery
And know there are windows and building out there
Describe your window and building. Is it brick? Are the windows old or new?
Much more beautiful than you.
Are (her) windows old or new? Is (her) building brick?
I'm no good with anything fragile;
Maybe you drop something fragile, literally?
It's bound to break beneath my feet.
Let your word choice as you build imagery invoke most of the conceptual meaning.
Use imagery with a topical meaning to build a inner conceptual meaning.