05-04-2019, 10:15 AM
All fair points. I'll fix the grammatical shortcomings right now, even. There's also nothing significant about who the woman is or what her relationship to the speaker is, the only significance is in her pursuits. And yes, neon should bring out the idea of artificiality, so let me know if that much isn't quite clear. Some other minor edits I may need to throw in there. As far as the Oscar Wilde reference, that's all within the final line -- nothing too crazy.
If you're the smartest person in the room, you're in the wrong room.
"Or, if a poet writes a poem, then immediately commits suicide (as any decent poet should)..." -- Erthona
"Or, if a poet writes a poem, then immediately commits suicide (as any decent poet should)..." -- Erthona