06-07-2018, 08:33 AM
I think the blindfold of loneliness is too ambitious an image for the content of that first stanza. It doesn't follow through with its uniqueness.
The unspoken whisper, whisper, shout, vow. Everything hangs on that line of thought. The rest of the poem seems arbitrary. Unworked out. It's consistent, logically, but not so much poetically. It's not horrible.
The unspoken whisper, whisper, shout, vow. Everything hangs on that line of thought. The rest of the poem seems arbitrary. Unworked out. It's consistent, logically, but not so much poetically. It's not horrible.

