NaPM April 8, 2018

[dukealien]

handle with care

this is a technically advanced product,
with an extraordinary range
and reliable, repeated ejection,
designed for soft targets.

please note that there are laws
impeding its sale
in zones of political instability.
see the foot notes
for explanation and contact us
directly for further information
on ways of evasion.

it is illegal to use the item
for crime.
its purpose is defense
and protection against the vast numbers
of other customers.

clean the product regularly, and keep the parts
away from infants younger than 36 months
who might suffocate by swallowing them.
do not dry any component in the microwave.
the backlash is considerable
and increases the probability of spilling...
therefore do not use it
while you drink hot coffee.
the product might be hazardous to health
and possibly lethal to humans,
even children above the age of 3.

we distance ourselves completely
from all kinds
of improper handling.

sorry duke, it has a similar topic as yours.
but inspiration came from a satire show i watched yesterday.  i guess if i knew more about guns it would be less ridiculous, but that´ll have to do.

No need to apologize - I submit these before reading any of the other entries in the thread, could as easily have happened to me.  And may.

But on the subject of warnings - following a consent decree in the case of an idiot a person who succeeded in shooting himself with one of their fine products while attempting to holster it, every Ruger revolver is roll-stamped on the barrel with the following:

BEFORE USING GUN - READ WARNINGS IN INSTRUCTION MANUAL AVAILABLE FREE FROM
---------- STURM, RUGER & CO., INC.  SOUTHPORT, CONN. U.S.A. ----------

(Had to get one out of the closet to make sure of the wording.  The company has moved from Connecticut, this is from an old example.)

They say, if you've got a Ruger and run out of ammunition, you can at least sit down and read it.  (Itallics in original.)