About time

[just mercedes]

 
 
 
 
Tupu-tupu-nui-a-uta asked for rain;
torrents, floods, rising
to engulf plains, hills,
even mountain peaks.
You turned from Tane?             
Build rafts, or drown.

* * *

From Elaphantiné came granite
for the temple at Sais. A block
took two thousand labourers
three years to move, even hollowed            i guess i miss something significant about the chamber, so i imagined".. three years to move to the gate" as the stanza´s end.
to make a chamber.
Delivered to the gate, and dropped.

* * *

clouds drift across the sky
while I                                              here i wondered about inserting something like "while i cast down my eyes,/..."  
chop wood, fetch water


a fight for naked survival vs  the creation of a historical monument (though looking at the latter closely the working conditions probably had something of a fight for survival as well).  
 mostly it´s in between..  someone chops wood for warmth and fetches water for thirst: this seems closer to living than surviving.
(that´s just what your poem made me think, i guess there´s more/ or a different story i don´t recognize since i don´t know about tupu and tane)

Even when you don't know the Zen koan about enlightenment "Before enlightenment, chop wood, carry water. After enlightenment, chop wood, carry water." I think the idea gets through.

The first part of the poem reflects the universal Deluge myth. Every culture has one, with the survival of only one family, the 'righteous'.

The second juxtaposes the results of 'righteous' men in their efforts to be admired by posterity - a lot of effort wasted.

The third seems to recognise that, and turns back to the only things in life worth doing.

 I don't understand your need to insert anything in the final stanza - in fact, I'm trying to pare it down even further.

Thanks for your read and comments.