10-18-2017, 10:02 PM
It was not the brightest morning,
Not a day to play in the field,
You’re a bit sick, you’ll soon be healed,
Not to worry! just a warning. Did you mean to leave the J as a lowercase?
Come to see you, all is so sad,
You wage your tail, yours eyes are bright,
Behind that spark I feel a fight,
Not to worry? I’m going mad.
You lay down, head in my hand,
Your velvet ear fits like a glove,
In one look can be so much love, I love this line, the idea is so beautiful
You’re so brave, should I take a stand?
I hate myself, still get a lick, This line is very relatable and adds depth to the poem
But stuck like a bear in a trap, What do you mean by a bear in a trap? Is this a common metaphor? If not consider replacing it with one that is more common.
Tell you “Let’s take a little nap.”
And the vet played his dirty trick.
Great job!
Not a day to play in the field,
You’re a bit sick, you’ll soon be healed,
Not to worry! just a warning. Did you mean to leave the J as a lowercase?
Come to see you, all is so sad,
You wage your tail, yours eyes are bright,
Behind that spark I feel a fight,
Not to worry? I’m going mad.
You lay down, head in my hand,
Your velvet ear fits like a glove,
In one look can be so much love, I love this line, the idea is so beautiful
You’re so brave, should I take a stand?
I hate myself, still get a lick, This line is very relatable and adds depth to the poem
But stuck like a bear in a trap, What do you mean by a bear in a trap? Is this a common metaphor? If not consider replacing it with one that is more common.
Tell you “Let’s take a little nap.”
And the vet played his dirty trick.
Great job!

