10-16-2017, 10:11 AM
Nice poem! I like the use of the word mad as "madder" and it's cool that it can be interpreted as both crazy and angry.
One thought I had was that I'm not sure if the narrator has a credible reason to have such disdain for the world he exists in, and it's not clear to me whether the narrator believes the man (which could be a stand-in for humanity more broadly) is justified in having this disdain and boredom. I think you could make it clearer where the narrator's opinion lies - maybe say "he thinks he's seen" or something like that. Otherwise, maybe bring into the poem examples of ways that the man actually understands or thinks he understands everything, and is bored and maddened by the world because of it.
Also in the last line, maybe "with answers" instead of "to answers" could also work well.
One thought I had was that I'm not sure if the narrator has a credible reason to have such disdain for the world he exists in, and it's not clear to me whether the narrator believes the man (which could be a stand-in for humanity more broadly) is justified in having this disdain and boredom. I think you could make it clearer where the narrator's opinion lies - maybe say "he thinks he's seen" or something like that. Otherwise, maybe bring into the poem examples of ways that the man actually understands or thinks he understands everything, and is bored and maddened by the world because of it.
Also in the last line, maybe "with answers" instead of "to answers" could also work well.