09-06-2017, 01:51 AM
Eyes heavy, body trembling, nightmares vast.
She's harassed by the forecast of the past. I love the formation of these first two lines.
Demons disguised in the form of lovers
Until she discovered their true colors.
She was used and abused,
Even though she refused.
Thinking about the past has come back to haunt her. Perhaps, "These thoughts come back to haunt her", or something...
In a blur she's transferred back to where the pain occurred.
Body and mind matured before her years. but she never recognized it, though the speaker does
He smears his body on hers as if the message wasn't clear.
Frozen in fear, out flows the tears.
Drained, pinned down,
Her expression blank now, hoping for a way out.
But her pleading is to no avail.
Face pale, body frail.
If her life is Hell
Then damn she wears it so well. I thought of compartmentalizing emotions to deal with later. Maybe omit Then
Her tears like cold diamonds on her face,
Wishing she could erase every embrace.
And he'll never admit to his evil.
He'll blame it on her intelligence and beauty being lethal.
She relives this moment on the circuit of her brain, circuit is a good choice all the way around
Detained by her pain.
Eyes heavy, body trembling, nightmares vast. A purposeful repeat?
Chilling cold shivers cast
Over her like frost on a winter rose.
And as she sits frozen the pain grows. perhaps, "She sits frozen as the pain grows"?
Thoughts screaming, head spinning, spiraling.
Emotions keep piling.
Lurking in the shadows is the demon of her past,
Back to cause havoc and break her at last.
But then she sees it clearer,
it's just her standing in the mirror.
Her past has passed though the memories are very present.
She'll one day embody the essence I wanted to read more about the new blessings, it ended too soon for me
Of creating a new blessing from past unpleasant lessons.
Through the tribulations and trials, the lows and highs
Again she will rise.
This was a very sensitive poem. It stirred up anger a few times as I read it.
It's wonderful in that it shows understanding and care, with anticipation of hope.
It really does fare well spoken.
nibbed
She's harassed by the forecast of the past. I love the formation of these first two lines.
Demons disguised in the form of lovers
Until she discovered their true colors.
She was used and abused,
Even though she refused.
Thinking about the past has come back to haunt her. Perhaps, "These thoughts come back to haunt her", or something...
In a blur she's transferred back to where the pain occurred.
Body and mind matured before her years. but she never recognized it, though the speaker does
He smears his body on hers as if the message wasn't clear.
Frozen in fear, out flows the tears.
Drained, pinned down,
Her expression blank now, hoping for a way out.
But her pleading is to no avail.
Face pale, body frail.
If her life is Hell
Then damn she wears it so well. I thought of compartmentalizing emotions to deal with later. Maybe omit Then
Her tears like cold diamonds on her face,
Wishing she could erase every embrace.
And he'll never admit to his evil.
He'll blame it on her intelligence and beauty being lethal.
She relives this moment on the circuit of her brain, circuit is a good choice all the way around
Detained by her pain.
Eyes heavy, body trembling, nightmares vast. A purposeful repeat?
Chilling cold shivers cast
Over her like frost on a winter rose.
And as she sits frozen the pain grows. perhaps, "She sits frozen as the pain grows"?
Thoughts screaming, head spinning, spiraling.
Emotions keep piling.
Lurking in the shadows is the demon of her past,
Back to cause havoc and break her at last.
But then she sees it clearer,
it's just her standing in the mirror.
Her past has passed though the memories are very present.
She'll one day embody the essence I wanted to read more about the new blessings, it ended too soon for me
Of creating a new blessing from past unpleasant lessons.
Through the tribulations and trials, the lows and highs
Again she will rise.
This was a very sensitive poem. It stirred up anger a few times as I read it.
It's wonderful in that it shows understanding and care, with anticipation of hope.
It really does fare well spoken.
nibbed
there's always a better reason to love