09-09-2017, 05:12 AM
Hi, this is so relatable. A few thoughts below...
I believe that I'm ok.
Like chocolate chips in bread batter, - wondering if you could start the poem with this line? It would link with the end of the poem.
I'm homely with that little extra something. - "little extra something" could mean: special/sparkle
Average height, weight, foot size. - N.B weight is not over-average
My glasses mist over at the mere mention of the word diet, - glasses mist over while running.
I am a satisfactory version of me.
But, someone always needs to introduce those eight little words.
Eight words drifting in a polluted sea of misconception, - now we start peeling off layers
Unwanted but present, bobbing along - "bobbing along" reference to running
In between the lies, small
But still deception nonetheless.
Surely they should be wrapped in cotton wool,
Coated in Candy Floss to add to their sweetness, - lovely sugary food reference
Masking the bitter pill, the caustic voice, - ouch re 8 words
The basic dismissal -
Of your natural image, your choice of how you see yourself.
I know that I will never be perfect
With desires so much more than a selfie stick & millionaire status,
I will always be emotionally charged,
The Duracell bunny stuck in hyper-mode, but I have hope
In each photographic image, I can cope with the inflections.
I know that each roll of softly kneaded skin, - dough reference
Each crazy paved line,
Is a memory, good & bad. - maybe "good and bad" are not necessary here and could be cut.
I do not believe in Photoshop!
So pass me the chocolate fudge cake - YES!
With a double scoop of salted caramel ice cream & make me smile - :-)
I believe that I'm ok.
Like chocolate chips in bread batter, - wondering if you could start the poem with this line? It would link with the end of the poem.
I'm homely with that little extra something. - "little extra something" could mean: special/sparkle
Average height, weight, foot size. - N.B weight is not over-average
My glasses mist over at the mere mention of the word diet, - glasses mist over while running.
I am a satisfactory version of me.
But, someone always needs to introduce those eight little words.
Eight words drifting in a polluted sea of misconception, - now we start peeling off layers
Unwanted but present, bobbing along - "bobbing along" reference to running
In between the lies, small
But still deception nonetheless.
Surely they should be wrapped in cotton wool,
Coated in Candy Floss to add to their sweetness, - lovely sugary food reference
Masking the bitter pill, the caustic voice, - ouch re 8 words
The basic dismissal -
Of your natural image, your choice of how you see yourself.
I know that I will never be perfect
With desires so much more than a selfie stick & millionaire status,
I will always be emotionally charged,
The Duracell bunny stuck in hyper-mode, but I have hope
In each photographic image, I can cope with the inflections.
I know that each roll of softly kneaded skin, - dough reference
Each crazy paved line,
Is a memory, good & bad. - maybe "good and bad" are not necessary here and could be cut.
I do not believe in Photoshop!
So pass me the chocolate fudge cake - YES!
With a double scoop of salted caramel ice cream & make me smile - :-)