The Contentment of Creation (True Beauty)

[The Four-Eyed Cat]

2nd revision w/title change


The Contentment of His Creation

He sends comfort
during lonely tribulation,                                           Lonely tribulation really strikes me. Great stanza
distractions:

His powerful billows
gently dab the firmaments,                                       Love the contradictionary nature of this stanza powerful billows/'gently' dabbing
forming whimsy caricature;

He waves mystery's handiwork,                                
displays feathers & frond.                                         Amazing sentence

His angels stand cornered
offering wind                                                          Comparing to the other stanzas, this one feels a bit lacking. 
only at His direction                                                'Wildflower' seems a bit out of context (or i'm just missing the reference)
teasing hints, done                                                
in fragrant wildflower.

He soothes tormented ears
in auditions of sparrow,                                         Making the animals plural would sound better
cricket & frog;

boasting His pure galleries
in precious, brilliant, song.                                   Great ending, i'd cut 'brilliant' out, though. That seems to add better to the flow (You can also 





ORIGINAL

True Beauty

He sends comfort
in lonely tribulation,
creating distraction:

His firmaments
daub in powerful billows,
forming softened
whimsy caricatures;

His handiwork
displays a mystery
found only in feathers & frond.

Directing windy offerings
of cornered angels
teasing in hints
of sweetened honeysuckle
& wild carrots
crocheted in blooms of white,

He soothes
tormented ears
with the auditions
of sparrows,
crickets & frogs;

boasting purest galleries
in precious, brilliant, song.

Without a doubt this is the best work i've had the pleasure of reading from you yet, Jeanine. The overall angelic experience is soothing, proofing that religiously themed poetry can be mellow and tranquil while not being zealous or evangelical. I'm sorry that my feedback is rather lacking, but take that as a compliment, as this i find this work filled to the brim with grace.