monster next door
#9
The poem has some interesting rhymes, but overall, it feels soulless and too formulaic. I don’t feel the magic of the morning, because the descriptors are too cliche - e.g. magic, exceptional. musical, soul, etc. The same is true for the fear that’s supposed to climb through out, words like - blood, violence, merciless, etc. I also think it could be shortened, which could help make it more precise.
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Messages In This Thread
monster next door - by typing mantis - 08-02-2017, 06:28 PM
RE: monster next door - by Ja wangana - 08-03-2017, 01:07 AM
RE: monster next door - by Lydish - 08-03-2017, 04:28 AM
RE: monster next door - by nibbed - 08-03-2017, 06:29 AM
RE: monster next door - by typing mantis - 08-04-2017, 06:03 PM
RE: monster next door - by billy - 08-04-2017, 06:07 PM
RE: monster next door - by Opal - 08-07-2017, 07:03 AM
RE: monster next door - by typing mantis - 08-07-2017, 12:47 PM
RE: monster next door - by hanumang108 - 08-07-2017, 06:13 PM
RE: monster next door - by Mbelcher - 08-10-2017, 11:21 PM
RE: monster next door - by Ecesis - 08-12-2017, 02:56 PM



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