Mylar/Helium - Edit2

[Thunderembargo]

Mylar/Helium


Glitter-blue, a cartoon star                                  (i like thinking of glitter as a colour,)
birthday helium balloon
wrinkled, half-inflated
crosses six busy freeway lanes
low, kitten-played
by unsettled crosswinds...................................(everything about this stanza works, perfectly balanced flirtations between positions of movement, observations, natural phenomena, contrapuntally balanced and juxtaposed through a semi-surreal description that exist purely in the poets mind)

Mylar abides forever                            (this claim is wonderfully bold and intriguing, it paves the way for the concurring claims; the way that the   unbiodegradable;                                                       vessel is effected by the substance
helium contrives
escape from all confinements.

As between flesh and spirit                    
meme and material
which is Mylar and which helium?
Flesh escapes, evanesces,
recycles after giving
life its declining lift
but meme and spirit
though they drift and tatter
seeming empty or forgotten
nonetheless endure.                                    (the unlikely turn of the poem in a abstractly moral direction proves that the poet has the uncanny ability to suggest an unlikely comparison, one can just as well search out the enduring aspect of life's drifting (and sometimes, seemingly endless) spirituality and spiritual choices, because the flesh that those choices lead towards, within, through or without is just as mysterious as the spirit which directed and informed the substance, form, material or matter to begin with

Edit1;

Glitter-blue, a cartoon star
birthday helium balloon
wrinkled, half-inflated
crosses six busy freeway lanes
low, cat-played
by unsettled crosswinds.

Mylar abides forever
unbiodegradable;
helium, like hydrogen
but less so, contrives
escape from all confinements.

As between flesh and spirit
meme and material
which is Mylar and which helium?
Flesh escapes, evanesces,
recycles after giving
life its declining lift
but meme and spirit
though they rest and tatter
seeming empty or forgotten
nonetheless endure.

original version;

Blue five-pointed shiny star
birthday helium balloon
wrinkled, half-inflated
crosses six busy freeway lanes
low, cat-played
by unsettled crosswinds.

Mylar nearly unbiodegradable
can last forever;
helium, like hydrogen
but less so, manages
escape from all confinements.

As between flesh and spirit
material and meme
which is Mylar and which helium?
Flesh escapes, evanesces,
recycles after giving life
its temporary and declining lift
but meme and spirit
though they rest and tatter
seeming empty or forgotten
nonetheless endure.