06-30-2017, 06:49 AM
(This post was last modified: 06-30-2017, 07:21 AM by Quixilated.)
Hello, Tiger, I like this one quite a lot. 
I'm not sure the first line should be in all caps. It makes me feel like the speaker is shouting. Perhaps he is supposed to have a booming voice, as some who preach professionally do? But though I've never been to one, I always imagined a conversation in a confessional to be held in hushed tones.
And then also I find myself wishing the last line could also be spoken aloud by adding quotation marks. "she's a good girl." But I read it that way even without them so.
I especially love the lines, "It's too dear a secret to me" and "I'm in enough trouble already." The first is beyond sweet and the second made me grin. I read this and it makes me think about how love can sometimes feel like it has it's own law and is it's own religion, that it can be too holy to be any business of a mere priest. Anyway, I'm a fan.
--Quix
I'm not sure the first line should be in all caps. It makes me feel like the speaker is shouting. Perhaps he is supposed to have a booming voice, as some who preach professionally do? But though I've never been to one, I always imagined a conversation in a confessional to be held in hushed tones.
And then also I find myself wishing the last line could also be spoken aloud by adding quotation marks. "she's a good girl." But I read it that way even without them so.
I especially love the lines, "It's too dear a secret to me" and "I'm in enough trouble already." The first is beyond sweet and the second made me grin. I read this and it makes me think about how love can sometimes feel like it has it's own law and is it's own religion, that it can be too holy to be any business of a mere priest. Anyway, I'm a fan.
--Quix
The Soufflé isn’t the soufflé; the soufflé is the recipe. --Clara