05-12-2017, 11:37 AM
Hi there Szczepan (wow, cool username btw)
This poem felt a little bit like a rollercoaster, and I loved the rhyming structure, simplistic but purposeful! It almost could be made into a song, the musician in me was attempting to sing it as I was reading! XD. I will attempt to post some small bits of critique, thank you for sharing this poem with us!
Crashed his hearse
on a one-way cul de sac ha, I live in a cul-de-sac so I visualized home when you mentioned this phrase, I like how you used this
Survived his widow well, I was not sure whether he was alive or not, but this confirmed it.
and he then drove back
His ghostwritten prose, I like this use of "ghostwritten", as writers often use a nom-de-plume or nom-de-guerre when publishing.
all autobiographies …
… tweak’d Pinocchio’s nose
with false tautologies had to look up tautologies, what a neat use of a word that implies rhyming in a poem
Consistency, veracity I think you really accurately brought to life your poem's title in these four lines here! The writer as the subject as a spirit
with him had died who might be alive or dead who wrote in such a manner seems a sign of some ways of how people become two people
He’d only be truthful one lier, one truth teller, twisting the truth in writing.
when he said that he lied
Really enjoyed this poem, it coincidentally tied into a chapter I just read in a class called Creative Nonfiction Writing about ethics. One thing I am not too terribly sure about are the use of ellipsis after autobiographies and before tweak'd. Thanks for sharing with us!
This poem felt a little bit like a rollercoaster, and I loved the rhyming structure, simplistic but purposeful! It almost could be made into a song, the musician in me was attempting to sing it as I was reading! XD. I will attempt to post some small bits of critique, thank you for sharing this poem with us!
Crashed his hearse
on a one-way cul de sac ha, I live in a cul-de-sac so I visualized home when you mentioned this phrase, I like how you used this
Survived his widow well, I was not sure whether he was alive or not, but this confirmed it.
and he then drove back
His ghostwritten prose, I like this use of "ghostwritten", as writers often use a nom-de-plume or nom-de-guerre when publishing.
all autobiographies …
… tweak’d Pinocchio’s nose
with false tautologies had to look up tautologies, what a neat use of a word that implies rhyming in a poem
Consistency, veracity I think you really accurately brought to life your poem's title in these four lines here! The writer as the subject as a spirit
with him had died who might be alive or dead who wrote in such a manner seems a sign of some ways of how people become two people
He’d only be truthful one lier, one truth teller, twisting the truth in writing.
when he said that he lied
Really enjoyed this poem, it coincidentally tied into a chapter I just read in a class called Creative Nonfiction Writing about ethics. One thing I am not too terribly sure about are the use of ellipsis after autobiographies and before tweak'd. Thanks for sharing with us!