The Contrary Spirit

[Richard]

Hey Szczepan,
I like your use of paradox and contradictions in this poem. My biggest suggestion would have to do with your structure and rhyming, but I'll explain more below:

Crashed his hearse -This first four lines gave me the mental image of a joyriding hearse driver. I like this image for some reason.
     on a one-way cul de sac
Survived his widow
     and he then drove back
His ghostwritten prose, -I would start a new stanza here. By having this as one stanza I get the impression the he/his in this poem is the same person, but I think it work better if you you broke this into stanzas. That way the he/his could be different people who are united by their contrary spirit.
     all autobiographies …
… tweak’d Pinocchio’s nose
     with false tautologies -I like this and the previous line. I think the idea a ghost writer and his contrary spirit could be a poem by itself.
Consistency, veracity
     with him had died
He’d only be truthful
     when he said that he lied -Whereas the first two parts are more specific about who it is about (a widow and a writer), this seems a bit vague to me. May be think of who would only be truthful when they lie and add it, so that you can end on a stronger image.

Lastly, I need to comment on the rhyming. You're using short lines, which usually implies a comedic or light tone when rhyming. This poem does not have that sort of tone, so I would suggest making your lines longer by combining them. This would shorten your poem, making each stanza a couplet, but I think it would strengthen the tone and the rhyme. Overall, I think this poem has some real promise, and I look forward to seeing where you take it from here.

Keep writing,
Richard