Revision 2: The Three Wives of Chuck Taine

[Todd]

Donald, I appreciate the comments. I'm in fact going to use some of them immediately (doubt its worthy of a revision but I will do a little cleanup).

I married her after she died    Haha, not pulling any punches with this first line, gets the attention. 
becoming a widower on my honeymoon—    I really ike this , but not sure you need 'becoming' , makes the line a tad cumbersome --Agreed
never something you easily bounce    wierd phrasing here.--agreed but need to keep it at the moment
back from. She told me and    Is the 'and' implying that the previous line was also something 'she told' you?--The and is part of another twist of sorts.  
she told me of the android,  Another twist?
how she had kissed the sun and opened   is she still the same 'she', or now the android?--I'll fix this. 
like a blossoming flower—till her petals blackened, 
burned away. She had walked together   'She'  'together' ? I see there is some devious multiplicity going on in this poem... 
then on a field of stars looking over 
her shoulder to where all things end,   A nice way of illustrating how far she has gone
each footfall echoing 
more distant than the last. 

Now she lies on each side of me, 
and I bury her again adjusting 
my shape to fill the well 
of our grief and joy.  Feels a bit too neat of a last line, perhaps. Although this does serve to contrast with the complexity beforehand. --I'm tempted to collapse this into the other strophe. It may feel less neat if it isn't emphasized. I won't do that now but I'll keep thinking about it.

Hi Todd, intriguing work here; I doubt I've picked up all this poem is about, but I'm certainly interested and though the density has thrown me at time, it also has an appeal too. I won't ask too many questions yet, but will keep an eye for further developments and hopefully come back again.

Thank you!

Best,

Todd