Rhyme on a Short Skirt on Dancefloor

[litQueen]

Rhyme on a Short Skirt on a Dancefloor
 
There are some things I’d take,
Yet far more things I won’t;
There are some things I want
Yet far more things I don’t. ---------------These first four lines make it seem like the poem is going to be a little  "deeper" than it is... This may have caused me being appalled on first read.
Oh, but cert’nly my dear, I will promise you this; ------ "cert'nly my dear"  - the apostrophe and the "my dear" turns the poem a little more playful and is a nice segway to the rest of the lines.
Your dainty derriere I would passionately kiss,
And your hair, soft as silk, I would gently caress
With your shoulders I’d wrestle, releasing your stress.
Now, your legs I would stroke from the hip to the toe ---- "the toe" The "the" adds a little extra.. It's good!
And I’d take your left hand; trace your palm gently, slow. - "Trace your Palm gently, slow" seems really romantic and intimate.. The rest of the physical description is a little more rough and "no strings" description if that makes sense... More like a hook up, so it doesn't really match...
But your heart and your mind
I think I’d leave behind.
Yes, you’re fairly nice looking, but stupid.

I love this! My first read I was slightly appalled, but I gave it a few more chances and it is quite clever.
Thanks!