02-17-2017, 05:17 AM
Just wanted to say what a wonderful depiction of nature this is. Such interesting wording and imagery. Nice angle given with "we who watch the watchers/over dry shoulders" to bring the reader into the poem right away. At first I felt the last line was too long, but really it's a great portrayal with rich sensory information. The conclusion was effective, but also gave me this unique feeling there would be more to come. That the character (feeling like it was myself) would now be off for another set of observations, the next stage of their journey. It reminded me of well done representational artwork where the artist focuses on just the right essential details but leaves just enough to the devices of the mind, so that the subject becomes one with the imagination of the observer. And so leaves a striking impact. Loved the specifics throughout the whole poem. Anyway, that's my rant! Very good read for me.
(11-22-2016, 01:51 AM)Sparkydashforth Wrote: Hedgerows smell of ramshackle owls.
We who watch the watchers, peer over the dry shoulders
of mole hills and warrens.
On broiled trails and paw paths are found
azimuth and declination; connective tissue and direction
of scurry and twitch.
At arid verges we sense a greening rim.
Clouds shape quenching ewers.
Boxed volumes of moths scatter at the fresh scent.