For Mae

[mrweiner]

Revision

Today I'm collecting shells
and the wind is rushing by me
like it's going to miss
its own wedding. I like the imagery, here.

Britney Spears is thirty five!
Holy hell.

We'd be sisters-in-law if I'd married Jared
and you'd married Seth like we planned. Should "we" here be "we'd" again?
I'll never forgive Seth—
he collects exes like baseball cards.
Remember how he whipped
that softball at you from second base
after you broke it off with him?
He broke your nose

and you dismissed it
like it was your fault
for taking your eye off the ball
(was that before or after his arrest?) I really like the pacing between from final line of the preceding stanza to this line.
The ball came at you with such force—
no one thinks you just missed— This second dash feels like the incorrect punctuation choice given the following line. Maybe consider a period, or substitute ellipses for the dashes.
he was the best player 
on the team, and his aim never wavered. That line break feel like it's in the wrong place. Maybe consider leaving "on the team" connected to the previous line.

You know what I miss?
Saved by the Bell and collecting
cards of New Kids on the Block.
I liked Jonathan, you liked Jordan— I think I'd like to see "you liked Jordan" on its own line. Might feel a bit more reminiscent and give the thoughts some space.
we said we'd be sisters.

I miss the family we never were—
the family we always were.

The wind rushes by
me like it's going to miss
its own wedding.
I'm dreading the next half
hour on the beach collecting shells.

Britney Spears is thirty five!
Holy hell.

We'd be sisters-in-law if I'd married Jared
and you'd married Seth like we planned.
I'll never forgive Seth—
he collects exes like baseball cards.
Remember how he whipped
that softball at you from second base
after you broke it off with him?
He broke your nose

and you dismissed
like it was your fault
for taking your eye off the ball
[was that before or after his arrest?]
The ball came at you with such force—
no one thinks you just missed—
he was the best player
on the team, and his aim never wavered.

You know what I miss?
Saved by the Bell and collecting
cards of New Kids on the Block.
I liked Jonathan, you liked Jordan—
we said we'd be sisters.

That wind needn't hurry so...

I think the form of it feeling like a letter to a friend. It certainly reads to me like somebody reminiscing to somebody they no longer have a relationship with. Nice work overall! My qualms are minimal.