Freedom to Love (a wedding poem)

[ellajam]

Hi, HK, I would scrap the opening rhyme, it sets up an expectation that the rest will rhyme. After that I think it's fine to keep an occasional rhyme. I've put a few notes in bold below.

**Thanks in advance for reading my poem. This is to read out at a wedding in a couple of weeks. I have not written in years so constructive feedback very welcome!**

Today is a perfect day
When two hearts intertwine as they may
Tis’ the beginning of an everlasting journey No need for tis, I'd use it's.
And the freedom of love shines its beauty

Standing in glorious oneness
Oh, thank the Lord for his greatness
For bringing perfect souls down a painted path Are they perfect souls or a perfect match?
From creating life through to the aftermath 

Unravelling every layer of the rose to the warmth of the sun 
Caressing every cell, infusing with protection and serenity Cell seems odd, consider infused.
Fresh dew touching the petals without fear of vulnerability
It is time to just be

Swirling through every colour of the rainbow 
Drifting through clouds, being carried with godly hands down a waterfall I'd drop "drifting through clouds".
Moments without hope for more than what they already are
Dreams do come true

May you dance with your children
Let the world see your wholeness
Let the joys and sorrows make you stronger

May your dreams interweave full of colour and beauty
Let love be the gentle breeze 
Let it cleanse and wash your soul

May you honour and respect each other's individuality. 
May your love glisten and shine and glow to the skies.
Be proud, be brave, be strong with humility.
May you both become one

Hope this helps, good luck with it and to the couple.