12-16-2016, 09:24 AM
I must say I do like those first two lines on S1, brilliant.
The rest is too vague to match the opening lines, and somewhat of a let down.
If it were mine I would stick to the micro details,
which often speak louder than dramatic oratorical statements.
The rest is too vague to match the opening lines, and somewhat of a let down.
If it were mine I would stick to the micro details,
which often speak louder than dramatic oratorical statements.
(12-16-2016, 07:24 AM)Wjames Wrote: I poisoned the daisies with ashes and butts
while plumbing the annals of Playboys and sluts
I’d been with when I was alone.
I trampled the corpses and walked back inside
to turn on the tv and placate my mind
with voices that were not my own.

