I don't have a name for this!!

[Jo Frumple]

Hey Hale! Thanks so much for the feedback and link! I'll be sure to check this stuff out! Surrealism sounds very interesting!

Peace,
~Jo

http://www.pigpenpoetry.com/thread-7740.html

This is a link to a surrealism practice. With the surrealism you create a feeling using things that may not directly make since. It has that association quality. At first I thought maybe you had gotten this from that exercise.  Maybe try these a few times then come back to these words. Atm it is more of a list than a poem. The feeling of this list is well.. unreachable. I think you would enjoy the practice it is great fun. Will probably help you out.

---

Hello Sparky! Thank you so so much for taking the time to critique! It means a lot!

I am just so happy that somebody understood the softly sensual parts! I wasn't sure if anybody would get that.

Yeah, the poem is good in some parts and much weaker in others. I kind-of didn't want it to be too short, but at the same time, I hope the weaker lines don't bring the poem down.

Thank you again!

Peace,
Jo

I write a lot of poetry that could be labeled surreal and stitched together with word associations. It's a good way
to break the logic up into a pastiche of images and meta-suggestions, by which I mean peripheral hints that
jump to more mental associations. Your poem almost works for me, there are many highlights where the
word-music flips into word-paintings. Some weak word choices, especially in the last third of the work.

Have made some observations below-

Hiyah everybody! This is my first poem I've posted on here but feel free to give it as much critique as it needs! I really hope yall like it! It is kinda sexy and the style is inspired by a band that I like. Maybe sometime I'll set it to music.



Mossy forests
Fondle soft
Feathered chorists
Secret loft.......................lovely sounds and full of pillow images.
Sylvan bed-tents
Dreamt dances
Unveiled consents
Real-life trances............you mentioned the sexiness, and this section is gently erotic.
Hear a whisper
Oak awnings
Lifting drifter
"Fly attendings."..............I do think that these lines are weak and less convincing
Blush hover
Sopping idle
"Come my lover."
Drenched tidal...................lovely aqueous imagery for love-making 
Bay appointed
Firm steady
Dye anointed
Yield heady
Gentle impress
Echo relish
Weld obsess
Revel plenish
Whorl ascent......................the word choice feels un-precise
Solar rising.........................maybe another way to paint a dawn image
Wellness advent
Closure prizing.

......................the theme seems to get a bit lost in these lines, but I think you are pointing to a good night and a fulfilled morning




Well done!